I wish you were more like....

One of the worst mistakes we can do in a serious relationship is to compare the one we love with the past.  "I wish you were more like your (brother/father/mother/sister/cousin)...."    "When we were dating you would..."   "All you ever want to do is sleep, when I first met you we always..."  It's even worse if you compare a spouse or girlfriend/boyfriend to someone you used to be in a relationship with!  It demeans.  It tears down.  It hurts.  It's a failure to encounter that person in the here and the now and a grave mistake indeed.

C.S. Lewis in his journal titled "A Grief Observed" wrote of an encounter with a person from his past.   After his wife's death he had become somewhat of a social recluse and an old friend called on him.   He was excited at the prospect of seeing him after all these years.   After a few hours with the fellow he found that his memory of him was not quite the person he really was.  In fact, after seeing some of the ticks and quirks of the persons personality he realized that he did indeed remember that person after all... but his memory tended to leave out details.. to tailor itself to Lewis's own likes and dislikes.   It was an astounding moment when he realized that his wife was more now than any memory that he could have of her.   He was failing to encounter her in the now, and instead remembering her in the past.   Even though she had died, she was still with him in ways that were even more complete and astounding.

“All reality is iconoclastic[..]The earthly beloved, even in this life, incessantly triumphs over your mere idea of her. And you want her to; you want her with all her resistances, all her faults, all her unexpectedness.... And this, not an image or memory, is what we are to love still, after she is dead.” - C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed 

I think that when Mary Magdalene went to the tomb she was doing much the same by living in the past.  That's part of grief after all.   The Resurrection that Jesus had spoken of so often was simply a thing she had relegated to the future.   Even the vision of the angels speaking to her from inside the tomb did not bring her out of her funk.  The Master himself stood behind her and he failed to recognize him.  She was looking for an image of the man, one she had in her mind... but the real Jesus was right there before her eyes.   It took her hearing her name called by God himself to recognize him.   It took an encounter with God, with Christ in His resurrected form to jar her out of herself, out of her own thoughts.. and into the present.

CCC 2158 God calls each one by name. Everyone's name is sacred. The name is the icon of the person. It demands respect as a sign of the dignity of the one who bears it.

We as fathers and mothers, brothers and sisters, friends and acquaintances must encounter Christ in the present.   To take time to look for him and listen for his voice to speak to us from the mouths of others.  As a parent I know just how difficult this can be.   To look for the image not only in the stranger but in those you live with every day.   This is the only way we can meet them exactly where they are and as who they are in order to journey with them through this life.   It takes stopping to listen for Christ to speak our name through the mouth of those created in His image.  Are we taking time to do this?

P.S.   Father Don Ahles' homily this morning touched on something that we should take note of, especially in light of what I wrote above.   Pope Francis has taken the memorial of Saint Mary Magdalene and turned it into a Feast.  That means that everywhere around the world it must be celebrated by Catholics.    He wants us to sit up and take notice of who Mary Magdalene really is, not who history has attempted to portray her as.  A grave error has been done to her image in that she has been confused with other women in the bible.  She was a wealthy woman who traveled with Jesus and helped support his ministry.  The Eastern Church calls her the Apostle to the Apostles.  She was not the prostitute but rather the woman who was delivered from seven spirits.  She then was sent to tell the Apostles themselves the good news.  We should take note of that too and realize that sometimes our image of her is clouded too and we need to encounter who she truly was that we may encounter who Christ is and what His message is to us.

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

A reflections on the Mass readings for the Feast of Saint Mary Magdalene: July 22, 2016.   Song of Songs 3:1-4; Psalm 63; The Holy Gospel According to Saint John 20:1-2, 11-18

What does a second grader know about love?

When I was in elementary school I had a crush on the prettiest girl in class.   One day she told me and another boy that she would be the girlfriend of the one who brought her the nicest gift.  The other guy got her a record or something.  Me?  I went home and took a necklace from my mom's jewelry box.  It was a gorgeous golden thing with lots of sparkles.  I knew for sure that I'd win the competition and get the girl! I gave her the necklace and of course she chose it over the record or whatever it was, and there I was.. with a girlfriend.  I didn't know what to do with her.   Now things were awkward and I had to try and figure out what to do with a girl.  My second grade brain hadn't quite caught up to the concept of dating.

Later that evening my mother was in a panic.  One of her favorite pieces of jewelry, worth several hundred dollars had disappeared.  I had never seen her so sad, so anxious.  I felt horrible.   I had taken something that wasn't mine to get something else I wanted.  I went back to school the next day to explain to the girl that it wasn't a cheap necklace and that my mom wanted it back.  The girl got angry with me, gave me the necklace back, and went with the other boys present.  I returned the necklace. My mother told me if I had just asked, she would have given me something to give the girl.  It took me years to learn the fullness of that lesson: gifts only mean something when they cost us something, a true gift is sacrifice, and secondly... relationships should not be based on how much the other gives me, but on how much we give each other. No one should have to buy friendship, it should be free.

Today is the feast of Corpus Christi.  That is the day we Catholics celebrate the thing that makes us uniquely different from all other Christians in the world.  The Eucharist.  We believe that at the words of consecration the body and blood are transformed (transubstantiation) into the body and blood of Jesus Christ himself. We believe in the real presence of God himself in the sacrament.   We don't think it is just a symbol, but rather a reality that Christ himself promised at the last supper.

the Lord Jesus, on the night he was handed over,
took bread, and, after he had given thanks,
broke it and said, "This is my body that is for you.
Do this in remembrance of me."
In the same way also the cup, after supper, saying,
"This cup is the new covenant in my blood.
Do this, as often as you drink it, in remembrance of me."
For as often as you eat this bread and drink the cup,
you proclaim the death of the Lord until he comes.

We believe that when we attend Mass we are transported outside of space and time, that Heaven for a moment kisses earth and that Christ is made present to us.  It is not a new sacrifice, not a re-sacrifice of Christ, but the very sacrifice of Calvary made present to us through the mystery of the Holy Spirit.  We receive then the body and blood of our God himself in the form of the Consecrated Host.  That Host then begins to transform us, if we allow it, into the body of Christ.  We are made one, as He and the Father are One.   We are being formed into the image that we were created to be, the person we were made to be, not the one we have become because of our fallen nature.

That's what it means to live a sacramental life.  It is not enough to only receive, but we must give.   Not enough to simply take this wonderful gift that Christ has given us through the Church, but rather we must become it!  We must become Eucharist for the world, our bodies broken and our blood poured out to the other.  No longer can we simply want our own desires drive our efforts but instead we must get our ego out of the way and allow Christ to shine through us.  "Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven."  It only means something when sacrifice is involved.   Just like when I was a child I wanted to take my mother's necklace and receive the reward for myself, today I must instead give of my own gifts, of my own treasures, sacrificially.. only then does it mean something, only then am I walking in the footsteps of Christ himself.

In the Gospel today, Jesus tells them "Give them some food yourselves."  How often He still says that to us today.   Just like the disciples, instead of realizing who it is that is speaking, we begin to wonder if we have enough.  Despite all the times we have seen Him provide, despite the times we know He has multiplied what little we have to offer into a spiritual bouquet that above and beyond anything we ourselves could ever imagine.. we begin to count what little we have.  "I could give, but then how would I pay for this or that?"  "We should take care of us first."  "Why should we support those who don't work?  They should earn it too!"  "Refugees?  Take care of X person first, or Y person first."

Notice what Jesus does next?  He takes their offering, He blesses it, divides it, and gives it back to them.. and they give it to the world.   That's what the Eucharist is all about.   He takes the bread we offer Him, He transforms it into His very Body and Blood.. then He gives it back to us... to give to the world.  Our calling is to bring that Eucharist out into the world and to become it!   To be Him, His hands, His feet.  To be the Body of Christ in the world, broken for it.. poured out for it.. blood sweat and tears..  until the entire world has been transformed, until every person has encountered Christ and the offer of forgiveness of sins.  As we journey into Memorial Day we should be reminded of all of those who did just that.  All of those who poured themselves out on the battlefields, the ditches, the deserts and oceans.   They died that we could have this opportunity to be free, but we cannot forget.

As my wife and my kids and I sat around the campfire tonight, I began to pray evening prayer.  It struck me just how lucky we have it in this country.   I could hear the neighbors talking about their lives.  The kids were playing on their cell phones.   The other neighbors were cooking and discussing juice cleanses and such.  The sun was setting slowly through the trees and the clear blue sky simply watched as we were oblivious to the blessings that God has bestowed on us.  How many people were somewhere in this world starving to death as I ate my potatoes and onions?  How many were stuck in refugees camps at some border not allowed to pass into the safety of some other country?  How many would give anything to have the cold water bottle that was laying a few feet from me in the grass unfinished?  We have more than enough, way more than enough.  Why do we hesitate when God calls us to "give them something to eat?"   There will always be enough.. and if each of us simply gives a pebble... we can start an avalanche.  It's only when we start to make a difference that the widow, the orphan, the refugee, the broken and the less fortunate will begin to be healed and taken care of.

As a popular meme goes:

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

Saint Agnes, Saint Agnes, Let Down Your Hair

Today we have the Feast of Saint Agnes. This extraordinary young lady lived a life that would put most of us to shame.  She is lauded for her purity and chastity, and her story is one that should make each of us question our own dedication to Christ.  At a young age she dedicated her virginity to God.  She felt such a personal relationship with Christ that she desired not to be married, but rather to go through life with God as her only spouse.  So strong was her desire that she turned down the advances of many men.  It was a dangerous time to be a Christian though.  Diocletian was emperor and he was very much known for his persecution and killing of Christians.

Eventually she angered the wrong people and she was turned in.  The emperor had her paraded before statues of the roman God's and demanded that she worship them.  She refused.  So he had her stripped naked and thrown into a brothel. Imagine that. She was only thirteen years old.  Being stripped, standing in this place where people were doing unimaginable things.  Legend has it that when they took her clothes off and stood her up for everyone to see her hair instantly grew longer to cover her entire body.  Then someone tried to rape her and was struck blind.  Another tried to rape her and was struck dead, and then at the prayer of this young Saint came back to life.

They continued to try and torture her and kill her.  Even at one point trying to burn her alive and she was unharmed.  Tiring of all of this, someone killed her by the sword.  All the while she refused to give up her relationship with Christ.  She refused to give in and be like everyone else. She kept her purity.  Her virginity. Her chastity.

We have lost that notion in our society these days.  So much so that it's even unpopular to even talk about it.  Our television shows are filled with casual sex, couples who are not married but live together, friends with benefits.   So much so that a happily married couple is very rarely portrayed in today's modern cinema.  Even our fairy tales have been remade into something of a soap opera where Snow White and Prince Charming are sneaking about behind Charming's wife.  It's funny how we have this notion that we are more civilized today.  We would blanch and cry fowl if someone where to suggest that a thirteen year old be married today.  Oh but they are children!  I agree.  Agnes' time was a different time for sure.  Yet, in today's society more and more thirteen year olds are sexually active and more often than not are on some form of artificial birth control.

Our readings show us two things that we can bring into this conversation.   In the first reading, Johnathan goes to David to warn him that his father, King Saul, wants to kill him.  Then Johnathan goes to Saul while David is in hiding and pleads his case.  This is one of the major things we should be doing.  Scripture records Johnathan and David as being best of friends.  When Johnathan saw his friend in trouble he did not stand idly by, he interceded for him.  He warned David of the danger.  He then went to the King to beg for reason, to beg for mercy.  We should be doing this for our children, for our nation.   We have a King who is much more reasonable, infinitely more merciful.  It is up to us to stand in the gap and pray for them.  We also must speak to them.  Warn them of the danger.  If we don't, who will?  We are the hands and feet, the body of Christ.  We must continue to act to change the world to where His will, will be done.

Then we see in the Gospel the answer to all of societies demons.  People were pressing on him.  A huge crowd had approached to find healing, relief from their physical sorrows.  Immediately upon seeing him unclean spirits would fall down and cry out the truth of who he was.  Too often we only want that physical healing.  The truth is though that if we come to Jesus, he will heal us all.  What we need to do though is to have an intimate and personal relationship with God.  We need to know him.  We need to be completely aware of who he is.  Then to share that with others.  Jesus healing ministry was second to the work he came to do.  Physical miracles are awesome, do not get me wrong... what would be more awesome is a spiritual revival throughout the world.  The only way to bring that about is to get down on our knees and cry out "You are the Son of God!"  Only when we get to know Jesus, when we have a relationship with him so powerful that others can see it in our walk and in our talk.. only then will they be drawn to him as well. 

There in the tabernacle is the key to every ill that society has.  It is the cure to our sexual epidemic. It is the cure to our slothfulness.  It is the cure to our perversions and sins.  In the Eucharist, in the Sacraments, we come face to face with the living God and his mercy pours out upon us.  The Holy Spirit, through the power and grace of God, has transformed simple bread and wine into the Body and Blood of our Lord Jesus Christ.  Even the demons recognize him, how can we fail to?  At times I think we all do.  That's why it is so important to make frequent reception of the Sacraments a part of our lives.   If even the demons fall to their knees crying out that he is the Son of God, how much more so you and I who believe?  It is time for us to be witnesses to the truth.  It is time for us to spread the Gospel.  The good news.  It is time for us to restore chastity to our society, to live as examples of purity. Not out of egotism and false piety, but out of love for Christ and respect for our respective vocations.  Are you with me?  Shall we let down our hair?

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."