I was meditating earlier, and I happened upon a memory that was very disturbing. I remember I had just divorced and the relationship I had just been in, was one that was unfaithful. I
won't go into details, but it really sheds some light on the things that were going on. I was dating this beautiful girl from Illinois, and my room-mate/work partner was engaged to this beautiful young woman. She was 19 or so, and completely sweet.
After rooming with him for about a month, he met some girl in the town we were working in and went out on a boat with her and needless to say, one thing led to another and he cheated on his fiancé. This wasn't the bad part. The part was my part that was horrible.
You see, the third time he went out with this woman I was sitting in the room on my laptop, and I got a phone call from this young woman who was left home with their child. You see, not only was he engaged, he was a father. She wanted to know what was going on? Why wasn't he returning phone calls? She confided in me that he had been unfaithful to her before, but had promised to never do it again.
Then she asked me, “Is he cheating on me?”
I lied. I told her he was just out and would be back soon. You see I chose keeping the guy I worked with and knew happy, against the truth. I didn't tell her that he was out for the third time with some girl he barely knew. I had just been in a relationship where my ex had been unfaithful, and it had been a huge blow to me. Yet here I was, able to tell someone the truth, and I don't.
I am quite ashamed of that time. I really don't have words to describe how I feel about it. Yet, I realize this verse really shows how bad a person I am.
Mathew 7:3 And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?
You see I sat there judging this fellow for his actions, thinking of how bad a person he was for treating his fiancé in such a way. I was so hung up on his sin, that I didn't even look at mine. The sin of lying. The sin of approving of that lifestyle. The sin of not telling him to his face that what he was doing was wrong. That what he was doing was against God's plan. Who was worse? He for cheating on her? Or I for lying to her to make her think he wasn't.
The next time you are in a situation where you have the opportunity to show love, to tell the truth, do it. Make your yes, yes and your no, no. Do everything for the Lord... everything.