I wish you were more like....

One of the worst mistakes we can do in a serious relationship is to compare the one we love with the past.  "I wish you were more like your (brother/father/mother/sister/cousin)...."    "When we were dating you would..."   "All you ever want to do is sleep, when I first met you we always..."  It's even worse if you compare a spouse or girlfriend/boyfriend to someone you used to be in a relationship with!  It demeans.  It tears down.  It hurts.  It's a failure to encounter that person in the here and the now and a grave mistake indeed.

C.S. Lewis in his journal titled "A Grief Observed" wrote of an encounter with a person from his past.   After his wife's death he had become somewhat of a social recluse and an old friend called on him.   He was excited at the prospect of seeing him after all these years.   After a few hours with the fellow he found that his memory of him was not quite the person he really was.  In fact, after seeing some of the ticks and quirks of the persons personality he realized that he did indeed remember that person after all... but his memory tended to leave out details.. to tailor itself to Lewis's own likes and dislikes.   It was an astounding moment when he realized that his wife was more now than any memory that he could have of her.   He was failing to encounter her in the now, and instead remembering her in the past.   Even though she had died, she was still with him in ways that were even more complete and astounding.

“All reality is iconoclastic[..]The earthly beloved, even in this life, incessantly triumphs over your mere idea of her. And you want her to; you want her with all her resistances, all her faults, all her unexpectedness.... And this, not an image or memory, is what we are to love still, after she is dead.” - C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed 

I think that when Mary Magdalene went to the tomb she was doing much the same by living in the past.  That's part of grief after all.   The Resurrection that Jesus had spoken of so often was simply a thing she had relegated to the future.   Even the vision of the angels speaking to her from inside the tomb did not bring her out of her funk.  The Master himself stood behind her and he failed to recognize him.  She was looking for an image of the man, one she had in her mind... but the real Jesus was right there before her eyes.   It took her hearing her name called by God himself to recognize him.   It took an encounter with God, with Christ in His resurrected form to jar her out of herself, out of her own thoughts.. and into the present.

CCC 2158 God calls each one by name. Everyone's name is sacred. The name is the icon of the person. It demands respect as a sign of the dignity of the one who bears it.

We as fathers and mothers, brothers and sisters, friends and acquaintances must encounter Christ in the present.   To take time to look for him and listen for his voice to speak to us from the mouths of others.  As a parent I know just how difficult this can be.   To look for the image not only in the stranger but in those you live with every day.   This is the only way we can meet them exactly where they are and as who they are in order to journey with them through this life.   It takes stopping to listen for Christ to speak our name through the mouth of those created in His image.  Are we taking time to do this?

P.S.   Father Don Ahles' homily this morning touched on something that we should take note of, especially in light of what I wrote above.   Pope Francis has taken the memorial of Saint Mary Magdalene and turned it into a Feast.  That means that everywhere around the world it must be celebrated by Catholics.    He wants us to sit up and take notice of who Mary Magdalene really is, not who history has attempted to portray her as.  A grave error has been done to her image in that she has been confused with other women in the bible.  She was a wealthy woman who traveled with Jesus and helped support his ministry.  The Eastern Church calls her the Apostle to the Apostles.  She was not the prostitute but rather the woman who was delivered from seven spirits.  She then was sent to tell the Apostles themselves the good news.  We should take note of that too and realize that sometimes our image of her is clouded too and we need to encounter who she truly was that we may encounter who Christ is and what His message is to us.

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

A reflections on the Mass readings for the Feast of Saint Mary Magdalene: July 22, 2016.   Song of Songs 3:1-4; Psalm 63; The Holy Gospel According to Saint John 20:1-2, 11-18

Lead me into the desert....

When I first got out on my own life was pretty good.   I was working a job at minimum wage.  I had my own place.  My own car.  I had a phone, internet, and food in the fridge.  Then I got a job making twenty five dollars a day driving a bus going to college.   The bills were getting paid.   I was eating well and had many friends.   The summer after I got my Associates degree I decided to get a job as an electrician.   I started making quite a bit more money.   I soon forgot how good life was at the start and began to live at this new level of 'wealth.'

It wasn't long until the bills weren't getting paid.  I had a lot more stuff for sure.   I ate more, partied more, had even more friends.   My relationships were getting more shallow though as I sought more and more enjoyment.  I was making more money than I had ever had.   I had a new car, well new to me.  I had plenty of books, a top of the line gaming computer, high speed internet, and on and on.   I was unhappy though.  Relationships started to fall apart.   Bills stopped being paid.  After a break up with a girl I thought was the 'one,' I took a job with a travelling electrical company and began to go on the road.  I went back to simplicity.   Life was starting to look pretty good again, and it kept getting better. 

The first reading reminds me of that journey.   The Israelites met God in the desert of all places.   In a land where they had to count on Him for food and drink.   They had a relationship and journeyed together.   Then He took them into a land of abundance and immediately they began to put more and more into their lives.  They turned from the one who would give them living water and instead tried to find that fulfillment in things. Just as I had done in my years as a young adult, and just as we tend to do today, we constantly look for that thing which will make us happy.  Sitting around day dreaming about what we would do if we won the lottery instead of looking for the gift that is already there... God himself in the Sacraments. 

The thing about the Gospel to me is that every person heard the same parable, every person encountered the same Jesus.  The Disciples, though, sat at His feet.   They didn't just encounter on a superficial level.   They wanted to be closer, to learn more.   They asked questions.  They journeyed with Him.   That's what relationships are about.  Time spent together.   That is why that little verse from Hosea is so powerful: "So I will allure her, I will lead her into the desert." (Hosea 2:16) This isn't God trying to pull you into the sparse desert to die.. it's a lover wanting to take you back to the simple times.. to where we met... to the beginning of our relationships.. to the way things used to be.  It's God calling to us to have an authentic encounter.  To remove all those things from our hearts that stand in the way of receiving the one thing that fits, the one thing that matters.   To get rid of all these empty, meaningless things... and encounter Him: in the Sacraments, in Sacred silence, and in His most distressing of disguises... the poor, the widow, the orphan, the sick, the prisoner, the refugee, the sinner and the saint. 

His servant and yours, 

Brian 

"He must increase, I must decrease."

A reflection on the daily Mass readings for Thursday of the Sixteenth Week in Ordinary Time: June 21, 2016.  Jeremiah 2:1-3, 7-8, 12-13; Psalm 36; The Holy Gospel According to Saint Matthew 13:10-17

Saint Agnes, Saint Agnes, Let Down Your Hair

Today we have the Feast of Saint Agnes. This extraordinary young lady lived a life that would put most of us to shame.  She is lauded for her purity and chastity, and her story is one that should make each of us question our own dedication to Christ.  At a young age she dedicated her virginity to God.  She felt such a personal relationship with Christ that she desired not to be married, but rather to go through life with God as her only spouse.  So strong was her desire that she turned down the advances of many men.  It was a dangerous time to be a Christian though.  Diocletian was emperor and he was very much known for his persecution and killing of Christians.

Eventually she angered the wrong people and she was turned in.  The emperor had her paraded before statues of the roman God's and demanded that she worship them.  She refused.  So he had her stripped naked and thrown into a brothel. Imagine that. She was only thirteen years old.  Being stripped, standing in this place where people were doing unimaginable things.  Legend has it that when they took her clothes off and stood her up for everyone to see her hair instantly grew longer to cover her entire body.  Then someone tried to rape her and was struck blind.  Another tried to rape her and was struck dead, and then at the prayer of this young Saint came back to life.

They continued to try and torture her and kill her.  Even at one point trying to burn her alive and she was unharmed.  Tiring of all of this, someone killed her by the sword.  All the while she refused to give up her relationship with Christ.  She refused to give in and be like everyone else. She kept her purity.  Her virginity. Her chastity.

We have lost that notion in our society these days.  So much so that it's even unpopular to even talk about it.  Our television shows are filled with casual sex, couples who are not married but live together, friends with benefits.   So much so that a happily married couple is very rarely portrayed in today's modern cinema.  Even our fairy tales have been remade into something of a soap opera where Snow White and Prince Charming are sneaking about behind Charming's wife.  It's funny how we have this notion that we are more civilized today.  We would blanch and cry fowl if someone where to suggest that a thirteen year old be married today.  Oh but they are children!  I agree.  Agnes' time was a different time for sure.  Yet, in today's society more and more thirteen year olds are sexually active and more often than not are on some form of artificial birth control.

Our readings show us two things that we can bring into this conversation.   In the first reading, Johnathan goes to David to warn him that his father, King Saul, wants to kill him.  Then Johnathan goes to Saul while David is in hiding and pleads his case.  This is one of the major things we should be doing.  Scripture records Johnathan and David as being best of friends.  When Johnathan saw his friend in trouble he did not stand idly by, he interceded for him.  He warned David of the danger.  He then went to the King to beg for reason, to beg for mercy.  We should be doing this for our children, for our nation.   We have a King who is much more reasonable, infinitely more merciful.  It is up to us to stand in the gap and pray for them.  We also must speak to them.  Warn them of the danger.  If we don't, who will?  We are the hands and feet, the body of Christ.  We must continue to act to change the world to where His will, will be done.

Then we see in the Gospel the answer to all of societies demons.  People were pressing on him.  A huge crowd had approached to find healing, relief from their physical sorrows.  Immediately upon seeing him unclean spirits would fall down and cry out the truth of who he was.  Too often we only want that physical healing.  The truth is though that if we come to Jesus, he will heal us all.  What we need to do though is to have an intimate and personal relationship with God.  We need to know him.  We need to be completely aware of who he is.  Then to share that with others.  Jesus healing ministry was second to the work he came to do.  Physical miracles are awesome, do not get me wrong... what would be more awesome is a spiritual revival throughout the world.  The only way to bring that about is to get down on our knees and cry out "You are the Son of God!"  Only when we get to know Jesus, when we have a relationship with him so powerful that others can see it in our walk and in our talk.. only then will they be drawn to him as well. 

There in the tabernacle is the key to every ill that society has.  It is the cure to our sexual epidemic. It is the cure to our slothfulness.  It is the cure to our perversions and sins.  In the Eucharist, in the Sacraments, we come face to face with the living God and his mercy pours out upon us.  The Holy Spirit, through the power and grace of God, has transformed simple bread and wine into the Body and Blood of our Lord Jesus Christ.  Even the demons recognize him, how can we fail to?  At times I think we all do.  That's why it is so important to make frequent reception of the Sacraments a part of our lives.   If even the demons fall to their knees crying out that he is the Son of God, how much more so you and I who believe?  It is time for us to be witnesses to the truth.  It is time for us to spread the Gospel.  The good news.  It is time for us to restore chastity to our society, to live as examples of purity. Not out of egotism and false piety, but out of love for Christ and respect for our respective vocations.  Are you with me?  Shall we let down our hair?

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

An Encounter with Christ

As many of you know, I've taken some time away from the computer for Lent; only recently returning to Facebook and blogging.  During that time I've tried to add some other pursuits that would help me grow closer to God.   One of the things I decided to do was get back to 'pleasure reading.'  With classes for ministry formation, bible studies, prayer groups, etc... a great deal of my reading has been 'assignments' or things I needed to research to plan a prayer retreat, or even the Facebook posts.  So I picked out a few books to read, to help me grow closer, but also books that are just for me.  Books I wanted to read.

One of those books is The Jesuit Guide to Almost Everything by Reverend James Martin, SJ.  This book interested me because of our new Holy Father, Pope Francis, and his Jesuit background.  I don't know a lot about Jesuits so trying to understand their spirituality is very interesting and enlightening to me.   I've also been reading the wonderful book, Pope Francis: Why He Leads the Way He Leads given to me as a gift by my dear friend Laci.   One of the interesting things I have found about Father Martin, is that he consistently looks for Gods presence in everything.  In every person. In every action. In every thought. In every 'desire'.   He looks to find God, if not in the moment, at least in retrospect to the end of his day when he does his daily Examen.  There is such a wonderful anecdote in the book by Father Martin about a man working in an administrative position who, when the door bell rings, would say "I am coming Lord!" in preparation for trying to see God in whoever had come to visit or to do business.

Such a simple concept, to look at your day and try to find God in each person you talk to.  In each task you are doing. In every blessing and even in every problem.  Father Tim Seigel  used to say much the same thing, when he would talk about the beauty of our round church.   He would tell us that in each person in the room, there is Jesus waiting.  I even remember a story about a grumpy old man that someone was trying to serve or at least talk with in a shelter, and the story ended with "Jesus wasn't in a very good mood that day."

It all boils down to "whatever you have done for the least of these, you have done for me" and in the same token "whatever you have not done for the least of these, you have not done for me."  This long introduction leads me to such a simple moment, but one that really opened my eyes and blessed me this morning.   On Thursdays we say a chaplet of Divine Mercy in our Sanctuary after Mass.  Today as we were praying for Mercy for the world and all of us in it, I was drawn to contemplating Mary Magdalene and the gospel from a few days previous.  In that Gospel Mary arrives at the tomb and finds it empty.  She is devastated.  Jesus walks up but she doesn't recognize him in his glorified state, and I'm sure her grief stricken heart and tears helped make it even more difficult to recognize anyone at all.  She, thinking he was the caretaker, begged him to just tell her where Jesus body was and she'd come get it.  She turned back to the tomb, turning her back on God... and a moment later, Jesus said her name.   Something so simple, but immediately she recognized him.  As we were praying for Divine Mercy, I was thinking of the beauty and mercy of that tender moment... being called by God, by name.

There I sat thinking looking around at the faces of the beautiful people praying with me, and asking myself do I see Jesus in this room? In Richard and Gene I always find love, in Mary I find patience and fortitude, in Paul I find the kindness to go out of his way to help everyone.  Yes, in these people I see Jesus every day.  My heart was content for I thought, "Yes, I have seen Jesus today in his body!"

Then as we were leaving, I was talking to Rita about the prayer basket we had set up in the entrance and she, as always, was kind and generous.  Then as she was leaving she gave me a hug and a kiss on the check, and she said "You tell your children and wife," then she paused for a moment as if taking time to get every word just right and said, "Haley.  Hannah. Sarah.  Moira. and Julie."  Pausing between each name as if they were precious and beautiful, and then "that I love them."   Then she walked away.  There He was.   When I was least expecting him, when I thought I had already seen through my own effort what he had to offer me for today, the God of Surprises blessed me with a beautiful moment in which he reminded me "I have called you by name.  You are mine." (Isaiah 43:1) Thank you Lord for reminding me that you love and watch over my family, and that they belong to you.  May I try to live up to that honor of having them in my life; and thank you Lord for Rita, for being your instrument today to bring me such a beautiful present.