I need more!

We are always looking for something a little more exciting, a little more stimulating.  As a young man I put that into action when it came to church.   I went around looking for worship that was a little more upbeat.   A little more loud.   From stage band worship to Pentecostal shouting, I kept going to find that next mountain top experience.  Wherever I was, regardless of the quality of the music, or the eloquence of the preacher... it wasn't enough.   I needed more... because the one thing I was doing wrong was trying to find something for me in it.   I wasn't worshiping God because it was the right thing to do.  No I was trying to find my next experience, me... my.. I... ego.

In our search for the perfect experience we often forget exactly what we have been given.   The enormous gift of the Holy Spirit is too frequently ignored or placed in the back of our minds.   As Christians we do not believe the Spirit is just some sort of non-tangible, ethereal force that can be controlled with enough knowledge or somatic gestures.  The Holy Spirit is a person, the third person of the Trinity.  One we should have a relationship with.  One who as St. Paul eloquently puts it describes to us "spiritual realities in spiritual terms."  When our minds are so caught up in our own selves... that's what St. Paul calls the natural man... that's when we are unable to experience fully who God is.   It's in this ignoring of the Holy Spirit, the presence of God in us, that we completely miss the amazing gift we are endowed with!

In our daily lives we are bombarded with desires and emotions.  From the flooding of sexual images in the various media to the constant attack on the sanctity of marriage we are called to be worldly, natural people.   What God wants to give us though is a fuller existence, a more joyful reality that exists.   He wants to give us the life He created us for!   We are called to be Spiritual people, a living temple for God.  Just as Jesus commanded the demon in the Gospel to be quiet and come out of the man in the synagogue, He is calling out to those things which stand in our way of being who we truly are.   He is telling our addictions, our sorrows, our fears... "Be quiet!  Come out of my child!"  We have to let go of our self though and let Him work in us through the Holy Spirit we received at Baptism.

We do not need a better Parish.    The music whether excellent or sub-par is not why you are there.   The homily, while an important and beautiful part of the spiritual nourishment you receive, does not have to be the best or most powerful one.   The Priest does not have to be the kindest or most generous man alive, he alone is not who you are there for.   You are there for Christ.   Present in the Sacraments of the Holy Catholic church.   You're not going to find a different one the next town over... He is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow.    It's not about you, it's about Him!   That's why we go to Mass... to worship the most High God.   Not to get something out of it.   Now if there are problems in those other areas?   Do something about it instead of bickering and gossiping.   Join the choir.  Become a Lector.   Join the building and grounds committee.   Volunteer on the Pastoral Council so you can get to know the Priest.. but above all spend some time speaking and listening to the Holy Spirit in your prayer life... for it is through Him that we can "understand the things freely given us by God.

A Prayer for Today

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

A reflection on the readings for Tuesday of the Twenty-Second Week in Ordinary Time.

Shopping Around?

A reflection on the daily readings for June 10th, 2016.

Many years ago I was in a state of limbo.   I had been Church shopping since my conversion at the age of 14.   I knew I was supposed to serve God, I knew that with all my heart.  I just kept finding reasons to go to a new church.  A wrong teaching here, an angry man there, a hypocrite or a holier than thou 'sinner.'  I started out in the Old Regular Baptist Church that my grandfather preached at.  Then someone said something that didn't make sense.  I moved to a Freewill Baptist church and that was good and rewarding for a while.  The music was pleasant, the sermons fiery and full of spittle.  Soon I found another thing that didn't make sense.  On to the Pentecostal church, a holiness church, a snake handling one, eventually a Methodist one for a brief few days and then an Episcopal one.  None of them had it all in my eyes.  I was looking for explosions, miracles, the fiery rain of heaven being called down to the consume an offering.

There I was sitting in a pew at an adoration service for an intention of Pope Benedict many years later.  I had no intention of ever becoming Catholic but I was studying the faith in order to keep my promise to raise my daughter in it, the one I gave at her baptism.  I honestly believed at that moment that I would re-baptize her when she asked for it later at an older age.  Little did I know that something was about to happen to me that I will never forget.  The only thing I would listen to at that point in my walk was the Bible.   Nothing else mattered.  Every answer, every question, everything a man needed to know I believed was contained right there in those pages.  If you couldn't show me?  I didn't want to hear it.  So there I was, playing Bible roulette.  I dunno if anyone else does that, I still do sometimes with Lectio Divina.   I would flip open the bible, point my finger onto a page with my eyes closed, and read a verse.

So here I was contemplating this thing the Catholics called transubstantiation.   They believed that this host up there was God himself,  Christ.  Body, soul and divinity.  Well, unless God told me that himself through the Bible I'd never believe it!  So here I was on the mountain top with Elijah, seeking to see God's face.  I wanted to know God so badly, so intimately that I could see him clearly.  In that moment I decided to flip open my Bible and ask God what he had to say to me.  I closed my eyes, flipped it open to a page, and put down my finger.  It landed in the Psalms:

Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.  - Psalm 46:10

I had been Church shopping because I wanted more fire.  I wanted the explosions, the rain, the wind and thunder. I wanted the miracles.  God wanted me to do something I had not been doing... to simply sit in silence and listen.  To find that whispering sound at the mouth of this cave I had hidden myself in and open my heart and mind long enough to truly find Him, in the place I least expected.  In the arms of the Catholic Church, which it turned out were open wide to me with mercy, grace, and love.  Elijah turned his face away to hide it, that he might not see God and die.  Yet, even the Psalmist called out with the same desire that I had, "I long to see your face, O Lord."  (Psalm 27:8b)  How can we see Him though?  How can we look at Him without losing our lives?  Even the great prophets feared looking on God face to face, that His grandeur and glory would be too much for our mortal bodies.

The Incarnation.  God became man that we might look upon His face with no fear of death.   To see who God is and learn more about Him.  The fullness of all revelation is right there in Christ himself.   Then Jesus, through the power of the Holy Spirit, transformed bread and wine into His own Body and Blood.  He gave us that Sacrament that we might be able to come forward again and again and see Him face to face.  Yes, there are miracles.  Yes, there are explosions.  Yes, God comes forward in some of the most amazing ways.  As a friend of mine once said, "Christ didn't come to bring me the fourth of July, he came to bring me Easter."  The silence of the tomb, the power of the Resurrection.    Miracles and physical healing was not the primary focus of Christ's mission.. but a message, one of forgiveness, of reconciliation with God.  One in which their no longer was a wall between the chosen people and the rest of creation, but one body, both Jew and Gentile, male and female.

He is waiting for us there every day.  In the tabernacle, in the consecrated host.   He wants us to come see Him.  To spend time with Him in prayer, at the Mass, and outside of it.  To spend time in Adoration and Praise.  To receive His sacramental presence into our very souls and then go out into the world as changed people.  People who do not just spend Sunday with Him, but every moment of their waking lives.  That take that presence out to those who are still in the cave, still demanding some powerful sign.  "If God would only make this cancer go away, I'd believe in Him."   "If God would appear right now in front of me, then I'd go back to Church."   "If all of God's people were Holy.. then I might return."  He's offering you something even more powerful.. silence... peace... joy in your heart.  Are you ready to give Him a chance?  Are you ready to stop shopping for a new church, pastor, or parish?  Once you find Him, once you let Him speak to you in the silence of your heart, you'll never need more explosive music, a better preacher, or even a softer pew... you'll just need Him and the rest?  Well the rest is just a bonus, the real message is in Christ's presence itself.

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease." 

Tear Down the Wall

When I was fresh out of college money was pretty hard to come by.  To try to make ends meet five of us moved into this one trailer and pooled our monies to make things happen.  It was an interesting thing.  On the surface one would have called us a community.   All of us professed to be Christians and attended church a few times a year.  We even talked from time to time about the Bible and listened to religious radio on lunch breaks when we could.  The thing was, we shared a home.. but you wouldn't say we were sharing much else.  One of us even had a shelf that contained their stuff.  I remember once when the brother of one of the guys living there drank something off the 'shelf'.   All of us gasped!  That's the 'shelf'!  You're in trouble!  Sure enough, when that roommate came home the first thing out of their mouth was, "Where is my stuff!"

That's a far cry from the ideal isn't it?  In the first reading for today's daily Mass we can see what the early Christians considered the ideal community.  Everything they had was in common!  They shared it all.  There were no shelves, no 'hey that's my shirt', everyone sold any money they had and the community leaders distributed it evenly so that none were lacking in need.  It's easy for me to look back at that living arrangement and pick it apart and say hey, we didn't meet that ideal at all did we?  Yet, if I'm honest, looking at any household today we can often find similar situations.  Someone upset because someone else wore their shirt.   Someone mad because their phone is dead because someone was playing on it when it was supposed to be charging... someone upset because the last thing of ice cream is gone and they didn't get any.   Pretty standard for any family isn't it?

The interesting thing about this reading from the history of the early church is that it's talking about an example for them to look up to.  Barnabas, the son of encouragement, lived in such a way that they felt we should all learn from him.  He sold what he had and brought it to the Apostles to distribute as they saw a need.  As a man who greatly admires Saint Francis of Assisi this truly touches my heart.  How many of us are willing to do that?  We complain every time we turn on the radio and someone is asking for money.  You can see the eyes roll and hear the sighs at times when a priest gets up during the year for the Diocesan Stewardship Appeal.  "There they are asking for money again."   "Why is it everytime I come to church they want more cash?"  "Don't they have enough?" Or better yet, "Why don't they sell everything in the Vatican and give it away to the poor!"  (Ask me about this last one sometime, my answer may shock you.)

Imagine though, another situation... if every one of us who professed to be Christian... gave like we should?  If we opened up our bank accounts and gave 1%, 2%, 10%... 100%?  What if instead of trying to pretend we own the money we earn.. we rather acknowledge that it was all a gift from God?  Then we put our money, our time, our talent, all of it... where our mouths were.   If every person in our Parish gave 10%?  I imagine we'd never have to ask for money.   Rather, we'd see a need and meet it.   This year we saw a need, $6,700 dollars... and we met it.   It took some time, but through some sacrificial fasting, prayer and almsgiving we are going to be able to build a well.  That's beautiful!  That's marvelous!  That's the way it should be!

Yet, there is something more that must be faced.  Lent is not a time to simply change for a season, and go back to who you were before.. No Lent is a time of metanoia, transformation, changing from bad habits to good... Lent is over, but the giving should just be starting!  That's why we as a Parish are looking at raising even more money, giving throughout the year and not just during the penitential season leading up to Lent.  Maybe we'll build a house?  Feed a village?  We are still discussing this as a pastoral council.

The Gospel reading talks about the wind.   The word there for Spirit and Wind is the same word! The breath.... the wind... the Spirit... the word has the connotation of presence.. of life.   When someone is unconscious you put a mirror under their nose to see if they are breathing.. with breath is life.  That's a powerful thought.  Jesus is there in the tabernacle.. breathing.. waiting for you.  Where he is.. life is.   Where he goes.. life goes... Where he is rejected? Life is rejected.  In the Eucharist is all of the life force in the universe.. the ultimate wind.. the ultimate Spirit... God himself. So you are given that gift.. that life.   You receive into you the breath of God.. something that cannot be contained but is greater than yourself.   Are you going out into the world with it?  Are you breathing life?

Some people have told me that when they enter the Catholic church they feel a presence.. like someone is there.. even when the Sanctuary is empty as far as they know.   That's Him.  That's the breath, the wind.. the Spirit..  That is Christ's presence in the tabernacle.. it is tangible, you know he's there.. I have never experienced that in any other church.  Yes, I've found beautiful prayer spaces.  I've enjoyed uplifting concerts.  I've prayed with men and women of many faiths and denominations.... I've never been in any of those churches empty and felt the presence I feel when being before the Eucharist.  That brings me to one other thought... When people meet you, when they pray with you, when they visit you or you visit them... when you converse, when you share, when you break bread together... do they feel His presence in you?  Are people aware of the breath of Christ, the Holy Spirit, in your life?  When you go from Mass at the end, when you are dismissed by the priest or Deacon.. they say "The Mass is ended, go forth glorifying the Lord with your lives."   That's not a dismissal to go back to your old way of life.. it's a challenge to go forth into the world as a living tabernacle, a temple of God... when people are in your presence they should know He is there too... it should change you... and they should know by your actions, words and deeds that you are a Catholic and a disciple of Christ.

So, the question becomes: "If you were on trial for being a Christian, would there be enough evidence to convict you?"

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

There's healing in the air tonight

This morning at daily Mass, Father Don Ahles mentioned an article by Norman Wirzba in which he mused on the thought that we might be able to now “declare the end of ‘Christian America.’”  The article speaks of the fact that we in America often portray ourselves as Christians through our speech, through our prayers, and through our presence at this or that local.  Yet, when we look at the actions, at the deeds of these Christians, we find that they don’t line up with the Christian line of thought presented in the Gospels.  

Although voters may speak piously and rather vaguely about Christian values and ideals, polls and election results communicate clearly this is a nation consumed by fear, anger and suspicion – none of which are Christian virtues.

Especially during this part of our political timeline we begin to see people who claim to be Catholic or Christian, yet they do play on those things.  The mudslinging begins.  This one can’t be trusted.  This one isn’t really ‘American.’  This one lied.  On and on it goes.  The thing is, we don’t seem very loving at all when we talk about politics.  We talk about how that we do need to vote, but then we turn lose these insults against the candidate we don’t like, and laud the one we do.. even though often we seem to be supporting those people who are truly against our faith entirely.  I think tomorrow's Gospel reading kind of sets the stage for the next line that caught my eye in his article.

[...]From a scriptural point of view, it is all rubbish. What matters is not what you say but how you live. And from a Christian point of view, nothing matters more than living a life that is inspired by God’s love for everyone.

A life inspired by God’s love for everyone.  Scripture affirms that one of the ways we should be recognized is by our love.  You know the song?  They will know we are Christian by our love?  What does God’s love look like?  Jesus has some pretty strong words to say about that.  Forgiveness.   That’s what God’s love looks like, first and foremost.  Jesus says to Peter that we must forgive not just seven times, but seventy seven fold (70X7 times.)  In the world of Biblical numerology seventy times seven does not represent a literal 490 times.. though that in and of itself would be impressive… rather it represents an infinite number.. forgiveness without limit.

I got to thinking about Lamech, the son of Cain.  Cain was seen as a hard man, but Lamech was the epitome of anger and abuse.  He claims to have killed a man just for wounding him, a young man too out of anger.  Lamech made the audacious claim that if the death of Cain would be avenged seven times, then the death of Lamech would be seventy and sevenfold.  In his world forgiveness was never given.  Anger was returned for anger.  Hate for hate. Death for a wound.  Not only did he return what was given, he multiplied it.  How in contrast that is to God’s love?  How far has he gone from God to be in such a world that does not forgive, but amplifies the hate and evil that is present.

Jesus on the other hand, offers us a world where all is forgiven.  That not only does God forgive perfectly, but we are challenged to do the same. That’s what love looks like.  It means offering your love to everyone regardless of what they do to you.  We’ve come a long way away from that message haven’t we?  We’ve begun to look less like Christians in this country, and more like followers of Lamech.  Our television shows become more catty, more snarky, more materialistic.  Just recently a movie was released in which the ‘hero’ was a man of violence, a man who harmed others, who was almost as much devil as he was avenger.   It sold out.  Record sells even.  Who are we following?  Our actions speak of that.  Our shows, our radio, our movies.. all show what we truly believe.

Then comes something that is very near to my heart though, something that fits right in with that unlimited forgiveness of God… the author goes on to say:

What about the refugees and immigrants who are being refused at our borders and made to feel unwelcome in our land, or the homeless (many of them ill) who do not have a home and proper protection from the elements, or the prison inmates (many of them African-American) who are treated like the garbage of society? [..]God is asking the nations about their public policy, not their verbal piety, because the true test of Christianity has only ever been the test of love.

There is the crux of the matter isn’t it?  To forgive as God forgives we have to forgive these people too.  We seem to be holding grudges against the ‘least of these.’  Some of those grudges from people they may not even know.  They’re muslim right?  Lesbian?  Gay? They are drug dealers and prostitutes.  They are vagabonds who don’t bother to work for themselves.  They.. they.. they.. we like to have an other to hate don’t we?  Yet, Christ told us to forgive not just those people we like, those we are comfortable with.. but even the enemy.. the other.. the they.   Are you ready to do that?  Our nation may not be a Christian nation.. to be honest, it may never have been a truly Christian one… but you and I challenged to be Christian regardless of what our nation is.   Are you ready to forgive?  To offer God’s mercy and grace to everyone? Not just those we choose to be worthy?  Are we ready to love like God loves?  That’s what we must learn to do if we want to keep using the word Christian to describe ourselves.. to lift up our own life… to sacrifice ourselves.. to go to our own Cross..  for everyone, not just those we want to choose, but those God puts before us, period.

His servant and yours,

Brian

“He must increase, I must decrease.”

Saint Agnes, Saint Agnes, Let Down Your Hair

Today we have the Feast of Saint Agnes. This extraordinary young lady lived a life that would put most of us to shame.  She is lauded for her purity and chastity, and her story is one that should make each of us question our own dedication to Christ.  At a young age she dedicated her virginity to God.  She felt such a personal relationship with Christ that she desired not to be married, but rather to go through life with God as her only spouse.  So strong was her desire that she turned down the advances of many men.  It was a dangerous time to be a Christian though.  Diocletian was emperor and he was very much known for his persecution and killing of Christians.

Eventually she angered the wrong people and she was turned in.  The emperor had her paraded before statues of the roman God's and demanded that she worship them.  She refused.  So he had her stripped naked and thrown into a brothel. Imagine that. She was only thirteen years old.  Being stripped, standing in this place where people were doing unimaginable things.  Legend has it that when they took her clothes off and stood her up for everyone to see her hair instantly grew longer to cover her entire body.  Then someone tried to rape her and was struck blind.  Another tried to rape her and was struck dead, and then at the prayer of this young Saint came back to life.

They continued to try and torture her and kill her.  Even at one point trying to burn her alive and she was unharmed.  Tiring of all of this, someone killed her by the sword.  All the while she refused to give up her relationship with Christ.  She refused to give in and be like everyone else. She kept her purity.  Her virginity. Her chastity.

We have lost that notion in our society these days.  So much so that it's even unpopular to even talk about it.  Our television shows are filled with casual sex, couples who are not married but live together, friends with benefits.   So much so that a happily married couple is very rarely portrayed in today's modern cinema.  Even our fairy tales have been remade into something of a soap opera where Snow White and Prince Charming are sneaking about behind Charming's wife.  It's funny how we have this notion that we are more civilized today.  We would blanch and cry fowl if someone where to suggest that a thirteen year old be married today.  Oh but they are children!  I agree.  Agnes' time was a different time for sure.  Yet, in today's society more and more thirteen year olds are sexually active and more often than not are on some form of artificial birth control.

Our readings show us two things that we can bring into this conversation.   In the first reading, Johnathan goes to David to warn him that his father, King Saul, wants to kill him.  Then Johnathan goes to Saul while David is in hiding and pleads his case.  This is one of the major things we should be doing.  Scripture records Johnathan and David as being best of friends.  When Johnathan saw his friend in trouble he did not stand idly by, he interceded for him.  He warned David of the danger.  He then went to the King to beg for reason, to beg for mercy.  We should be doing this for our children, for our nation.   We have a King who is much more reasonable, infinitely more merciful.  It is up to us to stand in the gap and pray for them.  We also must speak to them.  Warn them of the danger.  If we don't, who will?  We are the hands and feet, the body of Christ.  We must continue to act to change the world to where His will, will be done.

Then we see in the Gospel the answer to all of societies demons.  People were pressing on him.  A huge crowd had approached to find healing, relief from their physical sorrows.  Immediately upon seeing him unclean spirits would fall down and cry out the truth of who he was.  Too often we only want that physical healing.  The truth is though that if we come to Jesus, he will heal us all.  What we need to do though is to have an intimate and personal relationship with God.  We need to know him.  We need to be completely aware of who he is.  Then to share that with others.  Jesus healing ministry was second to the work he came to do.  Physical miracles are awesome, do not get me wrong... what would be more awesome is a spiritual revival throughout the world.  The only way to bring that about is to get down on our knees and cry out "You are the Son of God!"  Only when we get to know Jesus, when we have a relationship with him so powerful that others can see it in our walk and in our talk.. only then will they be drawn to him as well. 

There in the tabernacle is the key to every ill that society has.  It is the cure to our sexual epidemic. It is the cure to our slothfulness.  It is the cure to our perversions and sins.  In the Eucharist, in the Sacraments, we come face to face with the living God and his mercy pours out upon us.  The Holy Spirit, through the power and grace of God, has transformed simple bread and wine into the Body and Blood of our Lord Jesus Christ.  Even the demons recognize him, how can we fail to?  At times I think we all do.  That's why it is so important to make frequent reception of the Sacraments a part of our lives.   If even the demons fall to their knees crying out that he is the Son of God, how much more so you and I who believe?  It is time for us to be witnesses to the truth.  It is time for us to spread the Gospel.  The good news.  It is time for us to restore chastity to our society, to live as examples of purity. Not out of egotism and false piety, but out of love for Christ and respect for our respective vocations.  Are you with me?  Shall we let down our hair?

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

First things First

A few of my friends shared a video by Steve Harvey, a very successful comedian.   He seems to have several different versions of it, but they all point to the same message.  That at some point, you have got to jump to be successful.  I think it's a good message, but it is missing something.  In the version on Facebook he quotes the Bible and makes the message sound like a good, strong Biblical principle.  It almost though becomes that sort of prosperity Gospel that we hear from various Protestant ministers out in the world, it misses something, it misses discernment.  Steve goes on to say that when you jump, sometimes the Parachute (which he attributes to God) is not going to open and you're going to crash into the rocks.  Then he tells you to keep jumping until it does open.  That makes God out to be this entity that acts like a lottery.

The problem to me with this message is that God is always faithful.  It is us who are unfaithful.  Yes, we should jump if it is God's will.  That's when we will have a parachute.  God never hurts us on purpose.  He does however, permit us to hurt ourselves.  If we are jumping off a cliff over and over and bashing into the rocks?  It's because God didn't ask us to do it.  It's because we are after our own goals, our own wants and needs... and God has something better for us.  How do we know? How do we find out what he has in store for us?  By listening to Him.  I'll talk more about that in a minute.

Today's scripture readings for daily Mass give two prime examples of what I am talking about.  In the first reading we have Phinehas and Hophni.  These are the sons of Eli who we have been hearing about the last few days.  They aren't the best example of holiness.   In the book of Samuel it says that they slept with the women who served in the temple and cheated God and the people out of choice portions of the sacrifice.  They took more than they should have, and even took the beast pieces before the sacrifice was even offered up.   These were men who had become complacent, they were doing things for themselves instead of the Lord. 

The Philistines gathered to attack Israel.  The forces of Israel gathered and marched out on the battlefield only to suffer a great defeat.  Over four thousand men died in this first assault.  The Elders gathered togethered and began to question, why did God allow this to happen?  Then instead of going to the temple and asking for God's guidance, they simply decided to take it into their own hands.   They went to the temple and grabbed the Ark.  Phinehas and Hophni jumped!  They came with the Ark to the battlefield with no protests.  After all, the Ark was the presence of God!  As long as the Ark was there no one could lose.  Yet, not only did they lose... but Phinehas and Hophni were killed and the Ark was captured by the Philistines. 

One could say this is one of those examples of your parachute not opening, sure.   I think that would denigrate the severity of this loss to the Israelite people.  They had lost the Ark!   The Ark was the presence of God for the Jewish people.   This was his throne!  This was where He lived!  God was gone from them, his presence was stripped from them.  They did not ask him for advice.  They did not discern his will.   They simply assumed that he would do whatever they wanted. 

Then we see in the New Testament reading a man with great faith.  Being a leper he was an outcast.   A man of social stigma who was not allowed to join in worship, come to town, or eat with others.  He comes to Jesus and speaks words that all of us should consider a priveledge to recite: “If you wish, you can make me clean.”  This is a man who understands God's will, right?  He knows that God doesn't heal everyone.  He also knows that Jesus is the source, the Word, the place to go for healing.  He asks God to heal him, trusting, but not assuming.  If you wish.  Jesus does indeed.  He charges him then to tell no one, but to fulfill the law by going to the temple and offering up the sacrifice prescribed by Moses.

This man then goes on about his way telling everyone!  One minute he was conceding to God's plan, then the next he goes off on his own.  What happens next is what happens so often in our own lives, because of his own plan, God's plan is hindered.   God has already revealed to Him what he wants him to do.  Instead of doing it, he does his own thing.   Jesus became so popular, so famous, that it was impossible for Jesus to enter a town openly.  I imagine whoever won the Power Ball last night is going to know what this felt like.  Everywhere Jesus went, someone needed something.  Anyone who needed healing came out of the woodwork.  People pressed in on every side just trying to get a moment in with him.  It took his mission of proclaiming salvation to the people and turned it into a 'miracle show.' 

I think that is where our lesson from today's readings comes into play.  Discernment.  We must get to know God's will.  What does He wish.  We are already blessed so abundantly with life itself.  Everything on top of that is just icing on the cake.  So often that's all we are after.  More luxury.  More adventure.  More wealth.  But what does God want from us?  What is his plan?  Phinehas and Hophni paid the ultimate price for not following God's will.  While many of us will never be called to that sort of punishment, we must realize that the wages of sin are death.  If we drift too far from God's path we can too end up in a spiritual death.  Or we can be like the Leper, realizing God is the means to get out of our disease, our discomfort, our sorrow.  All too often that is when we turn to God isn't it?  At a funeral.  During a natural disaster.  A time of personal stress and sorrow.   Then afterwards, we forget God's plan for us.  We take matters into our own hands during time of prosperity.  We run off and do whatever we can.  Sometimes going directly against what God has asked us to do.

How do we know God's will?  That's where the Sacramental life comes into play.  We turn to Jesus Himself.  We receive the Holy Eucharist at Mass (daily when possible!) and allow it to slowly consume us, to change us.  We go to confession regularly to keep our hearts and minds focused on God's will in our lives and on living a life of true piety and faith.  We come to the Sacraments of Healing.  Then we spend time with the Scriptures.   We pray them.  We listen to God's Word speak through them.  We turn to the Church Fathers for understanding and interpretation.  What did the Apsotles teach them?  What did the first Christians believe?  Then we spend time in silence.  We listen for God's voice.  That's something many of us fail to do. We must make time for Sacred Silence.  A time when we aren't doing all the talking.  When we are doing the listening.

Then when you are certain this is where God wants you to go, this is the direction he wants you head in, this is the cliff he wants you to jump off of... then by all means, you can and should do so!  Discernment first, jumping second.   Otherwise you're doing exactly what Jesus warned against in his temptation in the desert.  Satan told him to jump off a cliff... don't worry God isn't going to let you dash your foot against a stone.  Jesus responded, "It is written, though shalt not tempt the Lord your God."  Jesus understand that God isn't sending us here to get beat up.  He is sending us here to be faithful yes, but obedient as well.    Following His will.  Not our own.   It's not about vacations, trips, and sports cars.  Those can be nice things.  It's about making the world a better place.  It's about living a life of obedience to Christ and service to others.  It's in living the beatitudes that we see true happiness.  And it's in discernment that we find God's will for us in our lives.

His servant and yours,

Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

Take Heart, I AM.

Oh how rich and beautiful are the readings for tomorrow's daily Mass, the Wednesday after Epiphany of the Christmas season. We see John in his Epistle continue to speak of the love that is God, and of our necessity of having it in our hearts.  Then we see this amazing and familiar scene of Jesus Christ walking across the water toward his Disciples as they are buffeted by the wind of an angry sea.  Mark, of the three evangelists, is the hardest on the apostles.  He is quick to point out their humanity, their failure.. their doubt.   There is so much more to the story though, so many gems that it would take many blogs to even begin to dissect them.   I want to touch on a few that really call out to me.

The first I'd like to talk about is the fact that Jesus went up on the mountain.  After he had performed a great miracle, one that revealed him to the people as a great prophet, he then went up on a mountain to pray.   For the most part the mention of going up on a mountain meant an encounter with God.   Here Jesus is going to be with his Father, to speak to him in communion.   He reminds us that at all times we must take a moment to be with God in solitude, in silence, one on one.  That's an important reminder.  We must make time for our relationship with God.  Scripture often records Jesus as going off alone to pray.  He never stays there though, he immediately comes back to be with others in response.  The Catechism says "His words and his works were the visible manifestation of his prayer in secret." (CCC 2602)  That is so important for us to remember.  Prayer is not just about petitioning, or asking.. it's about changing.   Changing the world, and changing us.  Our words and our works should flow from our prayer.  If we pray for peace?  We should speak and work for peace.  If we pray for justice? We should speak and work for justice.

Then Mark tells us that Jesus saw they were in trouble.   They were fighting against the wind.  The waves were buffeting them about and they were having trouble rowing.  Jesus gives us a strong example here.  His response to prayer is to look to see what the problem is.  He prays for God's will at all times, this we know.  Then in response, he goes out to find those in need of help.  He doesn't sit idly by when he notices they are in trouble, instead he does whatever it takes to get out to them.  That's our example.  That's our Christ.  We are not called to simply pray and then watch as the world falls apart.  We are called to pray, and then to work for the will of God in the world. We look for the winds, and we look for those buffeted by them.   We look for those who need God's loving hand.  We then do whatever it takes to serve them and to serve God.   Sometimes it seems like it's impossible.  Sometimes it is going to take a miracle.  Sometimes it is going to take walking on water.  We still have to get out there and in faith, try.

Then when they see him they are terrified.  Oh how like the Apostles we truly are.  We want to go to Heaven, all of us would freely admit that.  How it scares us that God might ask the difficult of us, the suspension of doubt... ask us to believe fully and truly.   We often say we do.  We often claim that we would do whatever God asks, and that we truly believe with 100% what our faith proclaims.  Do we though?  If we did the world would be changed.  If we believed that Christ was coming to us in the Eucharist, with the power of the universe in the palm of our hands... .would we ever miss Church?  Would we ever miss daily mass?  Would we ever complain about having to do this or that?  There is an old song that says "Oh lord, I want to go to heaven... but I don't wanna go tonight."  So many of us are trying to prop ourselves up against the Juke Box, to have one more bit of fun. 

Jesus says to them, "Take heart, it is I; have no fear."   Have courage son!  Literally "I AM."  Have no fear.  Oh how that we would take that to our own hearts this day.  Jesus, as he stands on the water itself, Master of the whole universe, showing that even creation itself is subject to Him.... says have no fear.  John was so clear in our need to reach that level of love, that perfected love, the love that allows us to cry out Abba Father, thy will be done!  "There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear because fear has to do with punishment, and so one who fears is not yet perfect in love."  Only then, only when we truly let go and let God, only when we realize how great and perfect his love is for us.. that's when we start to truly even grasp how wide and deep his mercy flows. 

Here you and I are, floating on this great sea of the world.  We are buffeted by the storm clouds of sin.   We are tempted by the waves of seduction.  Our hearts are constantly abused by the whims of the flesh.  When we try to row by ourselves, we don't make any headway against those winds.  The chaotic ocean of sin is only calmed when the Master of Creation gets into the boat with you.  That's our challenge.   To invite Jesus into our hearts, into our lives.. then we can't stop there... We must go out into the world, and make a difference.  That's what Mass is all about.   Joining together in prayer to receive Christ fully, body, soul and divinity, into our bodies.. that he can begin to change us.. then turning and bringing that visible manifestation of His prayer into the world through our words and actions.

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

Silent Night, On a Somber Note

Tomorrow is Christmas Eve.  It's a time of celebration, a time of great joy, and yet here I am at one A.M. in the morning having very somber thoughts.  I want to share those with you if you will bear with me.  I intended to write something uplifting, something joyful and edifying.  We will see if that comes out it.  Sometimes the Holy Spirit has his own idea of what my blog posts should be about.

I ran into a friend earlier today at the store while getting some things for dinner and for the house.  He stopped to talk to my wife and I as we were moving thorugh the freezer section.   We talked about his plans for the next few weeks.   He is travelling down south to a place he owns in a warm climate.  He'll be gone for a few weeks.  He has to decide if he's going to keep the place or sell it.  It is a good time to get away, right after Christmas.   He said he'll spend Christmas with the family then fly down.  Then he looked at me.  I guess I reminded him of her.  We spent some time together before she passed.  Tears came to both of our eyes.  He didn't want to talk about it, I didn't want to bring it up.  We hugged.  We talked anyway. It's the first Christmas since she went on to the next life.

I hope this Christmas for him will be one in which he finds how to deal with the sorrow and finds comfort.  The Gospel reading for the Night Mass tomorrow talks of how Joseph and Mary had to journey to a place with many memories.  He had to return to the land of his family to be counted in the census. Like my friend, he had to go back.  Decisions had to be made.  Worries sorted through.  As they journeyed together conversations had to be had.  Christmas Eve was a time of hardship.  A time of fear.  No money, no place to stay at an inn, a baby on the way.

Then the angels came to the Shepherds in the field.  They proclaimed the good news!  “Do not be afraid; for behold, I proclaim to you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. For today in the city of David savior has been born for you who is Christ and Lord. And this will be a sign for you: you will find an infant wrapped in swaddling clothes and lying in a manger.”  I think often we forget how much fear was involved the night before Christmas.  So many strange things happening.  Life was going on though.  Christ, the king of the universe, was being born into the world.  The greatest event in all of human history, the salvation and restoration of mankind to a right relationship with God, began in the still and darkness of night.  It began with a journey.  Both for Mary and Joseph, but also for all those who came to see Christ.  They had decisions to make.  Shepherd or wise man, both had to go on a journey looking for answers.

Just like my dear friend who is flying out to make decisions, what they all have in common is they are looking for answers.  You and I, we are looking for answers too.  Truly though the answer lies in one man, Jesus Christ.   He is the full revelation of God.  Everything we need to know about mankind, everything we need to know about God, everything we need to know about life... all of it lies in this God man, born in the darkness of night.  Shrouded in mystery.  Placed in a manger.  The Bread of Life.  The Son of Man.  Emmanuel.  God with us. 

Tomorrow as we begin our Christmas season anew, let us begin to search earnestly for answers.  Don't let Christmas get away from you.  Too many times we get so caught up in the presents, in the food, in the atmosphere, that we don't spend time in prayer.. time with Christ.  We too have a journey to make, we just don't know when the final flight will occur.  Christ is being born into our world in the past, present and future.   What does that mean to us?   What do we do about it?  There can be a lot of fear.  A lot of doubt.   A lot of questions.  We know though, that a wise man once said, "We saw his star when it rose and have come to worship him."   Wise men still seek him, that's where the answers are. 

His servant and yours,
Brian

The Writing on the Wall

When the girls were all still little, before our fourth, I came home from work one day to find a bunch of artwork on the bedroom wall with words written in it.   There were some names, some drawings, and even some lipstick and nail polish mixed in.  I called each of the kids in and Julie I began to ask them who did it.  There was a lot of finger pointing, a lot of blame towards the others.  Her mother and I did not need to ask.  We already knew what was written on the wall, and we knew who did it.  That's because only the oldest knew how to read and write.  The fact there were words in the 'art' work indicated she was involved.

When I read this reading for tomorrow's daily Mass I think of that moment.  The kings sorcerers and diviners could not tell you who wrote on the wall or what they wrote.  Daniel though, knew immediately what it was.  Just like Julie and I knew that the oldest was the author, Daniel knew immediately it was a message from God.  How?  Because he knew Him.  Just like we knew enough about our daughters to know who wrote it, we could also begin to understand what she meant by it.  What the words meant to her, what the colors meant to her, what the images might mean to her.  We could begin to understand the message, because we were familiar with the artist.  Daniel knew the message on the wall of king Belshazzar because he too was familiar with it's artist.  He knew the work of God when he saw it.

Daniel didn't need time to figure out the message.  He began to speak immediately informing the king of what God intended by the three words on the wall.  The fact that Daniel was already familiar with God and close to Him allowed him to speak the interpretation.  God gave him the meaning.  God gave him the words to say.

We see the same message in tomorrow's Gospel.  Jesus warns the disciples in the crowd that they will go through much suffering and persecution on account of him.  He tells them though that they don't need to worry about what to say, because he will give them the words to say. Through the Holy Spirit they will be reminded of what words to say.  Because they know Him, and are familiar with Him, the message will be clear immediately.

As we approach the end of the Liturgical year, we approach the season of Advent.  That season reminds us of Jesus birth in our world, of his second coming, and of the need for us to keep him 'being born' in the world every moment of every day.  The question becomes, do you know Him?  Do you know Him well enough that writing on the wall will be clear to you?  Are you open to His spirit so that He can guide your words and actions?  Are you allowing Him to be born through you? Let us draw closer to Christ through the Church, and through the Sacraments.  Let us prepare our hearts to be a living manger, that Christ may come to us through the Eucharist and remain born in our hearts, feeding us, transforming us, into something more.  Just as the manger in the cave must have been made sacred, holy by touching Christ himself... so too must you remember that you yourself are touched by Christ and are being made Holy. 

I have work to do to become a Saint.  Let us journey together on this road.  Helping one another to see the writing on the wall and receive the message from God in our hearts, minds, and souls.

His servant and yours,
Brian

Taking a Stand

Tomorrow's readings are quite interesting.  The reading from the book of Maccabees shows us the story of an elderly man who is being forced to go against his religion.  During this time Antiochus Epiphanes was persecuting the Jews and trying to force them to join a state sanctioned religion.  Antiochus wanted to unite his kingdom by creating a common religion, getting rid of anything foreign or different.  Eleazar was a Jew, and they were forcing him to eat pork.  This was abhorrent to him.  He spit it out and was condemned to death for doing so.  His friends tried to convince him that he should hide some kosher meat in his pocket and when they wanted to see him eat the pork, slip some of the kosher stuff in and pretend.

Eleazer realized that by doing something like that, those who saw him might think he actually ate the pork.  He did not want to become a stumbling block to others causing them to fall as well, so he refused.  Then his friends turned angry.  They not only felt he was crazy for dying for his faith, but they probably felt inside the conviction that they had failed to do the same.  We often see that with many things in life.  One of the sayings in Wisdom we studied the other day is that a good man is often seen as obnoxious to those around him.  Just his presence can cause those who are living wrong to feel convicted.

Have you seen that before?  You are standing talking to someone who knows you are religious and they drop the F-bomb, and then they apologize to you for doing it in front of you?  Or they send you an email, an email they'd have no problem to send that email to anyone else, then you get another email blushingly declaring their sorrow for having offended you.  People see those who are doing what they believe to be right, and they begin to feel convicted, even if you never say a word. 

I think that is part of the message we see in the Gospel reading too.  Zaccheus has just done something most others aren't willing to do.  He took a stand, literally up in a tree!  He went up to where he needed to be to encounter Christ.  In the process Christ comes to his house and declares that Zaccheus has received salvation this day!  Before he hears this though, Zaccheus does something that shows he has had a change of heart.   He declares “Behold, half of my possessions, Lord, I shall give to the poor, and if I have extorted anything from anyone I shall repay it four times over.” 

Many people later condemned Jesus for this sort of behavior.  For going into the homes of tax collectors and sinners.   I think for some of them they probably were a bit jealous too.  Not just of Jesus going to those homes instead of to theirs... but also of Zaccheus who did what they should have been doing.  I think that his actions caused conviction in their hearts.  Here was the 'other'.  Their they.  The sinner.  They were supposed to be holy.  Yet, they held on to their money with a tight fist.  Here was the one who they wanted to condemn and convict.. and he was giving up half of everything he owned!  How that must have stung their hearts? 

It struck me too that tomorrow is the feast day of Saint Elizabeth of Hungary.  Here is another person who took a stand.  She took her wealth and used it to help others.  Much like Zaccheus she had an open hand, often to the chagrin of those around her, giving away food and money.  When her husband died she renounced the world and went into serving Jesus full time. 

What can we learn from these two men and one holy woman?  I think we can learn a very important lesson.  First that we must take a stand, and second that sometimes the stand is not where we expect it to be.   All of Eleazer's friends expected him to take the easy way out.  They were willing to help him fool others so that his conscious was still clear, but that he would not have to die.  He took a stand.  He died for his faith, for his God.  Society expected one thing, he went with God instead.

Zaccheus was a tax collector.  He had money, wealth, comfort.   Everyone who was like him probably expected him to just stay wealthy, they thought him crazy for giving it all up.  Those who were 'religious' saw him as the sinner.  The last thing they expected from a man like him, the chief of the tax collectors, was conversion and generosity.  He took a stand. Society expected one thing, he went with God instead.

Saint Elizabeth was a princess, rich and wealthy.  She was queen by the age of 14.  Everyone would have expected her to have others do her bidding.  Even in her generosity, they might have expected her to hand the money out or to send a servant to deliver it.  Instead we hear legends of her running out of the palace towards the commons with her apron full of loaves of bread!  Society expected one thing, she went with God instead.

We have a unique opportunity today.  With everything going on in the world, from France to Africa, we see people in need.  There is a great level of fear towards those refugees.  Some of them could very well be plants, people who wish harm to others.  Others though are just mothers, fathers, daughters, sons.  People in need.  Starving and simply trying to get away from persecution.  Society wants us to turn our backs on all of them.  They want us to simply desire our comfort, stay where we are, and protect ourselves.  Part of me wants to fear too.   Part of me wants to say, you know?  I want to protect my family, my country, my friends.  I do.  At the same time, there are other people out there who need food. Who need shelter.  Who need love.   Society wants us to do one thing.. but what does God want us to do? 

I don't have an answer for you.. but I do know this.  Sometimes, like Zaccheus, we need to get a change of perspective.  If we truly want to see Jesus, we need to climb a tree.  We need to change our vantage point because down here on earth, we simply cannot see him for all the other things in our way.  We need to spend time opening our hearts to Jesus.  During this time of thanksgiving, as we approach a holiday in which we are to give thanks for all that we have... recall that the very word Eucharist means 'thanksgiving.'  Spend more time in prayer, receive the sacraments as frequently as possible, and seek out some time alone with Christ in adoration.  Ask him to come to your house today, and try to see this situation from a different view point.  We have so much to give thanks for... how would we feel if our world was taken out from under our feet?  If our children were starving?  If we feared for our lives and all of the countries that might offer us a glimmer of hope had closed their borders, leaving us with no where to turn? 

His servant and yours,
In Christ,
Brian

Misericordia

Tonight I attended a Spanish Mass at our Parish.  Both to work on my Spanish listening skills and to
attempt to build some friendships and familiarity with a part of the Parish that I often do not get to see.  I have several friends who come to daily Mass or who are involved in other ministries whose native tongue is Spanish and it was good to see them and spend time with them in worship.  I did feel a little out of place though.

Why?  Probably ego?  Pride? Unfamiliarity?   It was good for me though, that is for sure.  I kept hearing this one word though, one I recognized from my studies and from preparing before hand.  "Misericordia."  Mercy.  Kindness.  I heard it in the antiphon of the Psalm.  I heard it in the singing.  I heard it in the readings.  I heard it Father Dorado's homily. (Most of which I was lost in, but I did understand parts of it!)

At the end a friend of mine, Ignatio, grabbed my hand and welcomed me.  Made sure to encourage me and talked about his experience of going to daily Mass in English.  He talked about how he at first did not understand much, but now after a few years, really has begun to understand it well enough to feel comfortable.  Here was a man willing to put his ego to the side.  A man willing to go where he was uncomfortable, where he didn't know many, but persisted through those feelings in order to learn enough of a language to help those of us who did not know his own to be able to experience one another in the body of Christ.

There are those out there who will tell you, "You are not an American if you don't speak English."  "I refuse to learn another language!"  "Why the hell should I have to press 1 to get English? This is America!"  To that I say rubbish.  Today's gospel calls out to us to put ourselves to the side and to instead humble ourselves to be servants.  Servants don't make those they are serving learn their language, rather they humble themselves and put forth the effort to learn the language themselves. "You know that those who are recognized as rulers over the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones make their authority over them felt.  But it shall not be so among you. Rather, whoever wishes to be great among you will be your servant; whoever wishes to be first among you will be the slave of all." 

Think about this for just a moment.  The God of the universe is so far beyond us that it would be like comparing a human to a worm.  This God of ours humbled himself so much that he condescended into one of us, becoming one of us in every way, except sin.  He learnt our language.   He took on our ways.  He didn't expect us to suddenly learn to speak God's tongue.  How much more so should we be willing to approach our brothers as if they were Christ himself?  Learning a language is the least we can do.   Learning who they are, where they are from, their name;  those are other steps we should take.  Their customs, their cultures, their families.  They are part of us.  We are one body.  There aren't 500,000 bodies of Christ.. only one. 

So go out into the world.  Serve your brothers and sisters.  Learn to speak to them.  More importantly learn to listen and understand them.  Try to learn their names.  Their families.  Their interests.   Let them know how important they are to you.  How much you love them.   Don't expect anything in return.  Just offer yourself for them, as Christ offered himself to us.  Then we can cry out together, with our brothers and sisters, in all tongues: "Lord, let your mercy be on us, as we place our trust in you."

In Christ,

His servant and yours,

Brian

Dressing up, Dressing down, Dressing out?

10 the Lord said to Moses: Go to the people and have them sanctify themselves today and tomorrow. Have them wash their garments 11 and be ready for the third day; for on the third day the Lord will come down on Mount Sinai in the sight of all the people.  Exodus 19:10-11 NAB

I've been reading a lot about modesty lately.  In reading those articles I often find articles also about 'dressing up' for Mass.  In reading about that I've felt convicted a few times about wearing my blue jeans and t-shirts.  I normally try to spiff up a little you know, a polo shirt or a button down shirt, Some slacks or khakis.   That's my look really for Mass.   I kept feeling though like I should be wearing a 'shirt and tie.'  I quickly pushed that out of my mind, it's summer!  It's 85+ out there, I already sweat enough as it is!

Then last night I felt the conviction again and talked to my wife about it. We both talked about the pros and cons, almost in a practical manner.  I was raised in a Baptist church where blue jeans and t-shirts were common for weekend services and everyone always said "God is no respecter of persons, he doesn't look at your clothes.'   You're right there.  God doesn't look at my clothes, he looks at my heart.  He judges my actions and their motives.

That brings me to this though... if I truly believe that Jesus Christ is physically present; body, soul and divinity; in the Eucharist... then how would I show that?   If the President were coming to town and having a banquet, I'd dress up for that.   If the bishop were coming to our parish, I'd be in my tux and knights regalia.  Yet, Jesus Christ is there every weekend.  He's not judging me based on my outside dress, but what are my motives? What are my actions?  Am I showing Him how much I love Him?   Am I treating Him with more respect and dignity than I would a visiting dignitary?

I still didn't want to wear my tie.  In fact, I didn't even know where it was.  I had 'halfheartedly' looked for it but had not found it.   Then while I was washing clothes last night I noticed my button up dress shirt in a pile of dirty laundry.  I grabbed it and just tossed it in with the others knowing I was going to need it for my scrutinies in a few weeks.  I washed clothes, and dried them.  Then while I was removing the clothes from the drier this morning to put it on my eyes locked on to something hanging behind the dryer on a pipe.  There, clean and crisp, was my tie.

I get it ok?  The shirt was right there.  The tie was right there.  All that was keeping me from putting it on ... was me.   So today I showed up to Mass in a tie.  Many people commented on my dress.  My daughter even asked me, why are you dressed up?  To which I responded, "I got invited to see Jesus this morning, so I dressed up for it."   She said, "Can you tone it down a little? That's too fancy for Mass."

We got a lot of work to do.  Starting right here in our own homes.  Our kids need to see us treating Mass as if it is worth dressing up for, because it is.  If our kids think that wearing a shirt and tie is too fancy for Mass?  We've missed the mark somewhere.  Yes, I know each persons best is different.  If your best clothes are honestly a pair of jeans and a clean t-shirt, don't feel bad for wearing them.  If you have a suit in the closet and you're wearing your ratty junk to Mass?  Something is wrong in our heart when we act that way.

Dress to show how you believe, offer yourself as a living sacrifice at Mass.  If you sweat?  So be it.  Uncomfortable collar?  Offer it up.  You're in the presence of the King of Kings.... it's time for us as Catholics to show the world what that means.

In Christ,

Brian