Sail on Silver Girl

Lately, as most of you know, I've been having some kidney issues.  As part of the treatment for this 10mm kidney stone my doctor suggested I invert myself to 45 degrees every night after having consumed sixteen ounces of water.  They already took the step of doing lithotripsy to break the stone up into smaller pieces (hopefully).   Now the goal is to use gravity and fluid to get those pieces up out of the bottom of my kidneys and through the bladder to freedom.  The Exodus of the kidney stones eh? So I've been taking this old box spring and placing it on the couch to create as much of an angle as I can.  Then I drink my water, wait thirty minutes and lay with my face downhill for half an hour.

What I did not expect is that my daughter would love this time.  She can't wait to get on the mattress and lay next to me reading or watching TV.  Daddy are we going to do that tonight?  Then we play around, I poke her and tickle her.. and sometimes I roll over on her and mash her like I forgot she was there.  All the while she's giggling, reading, or often just falling asleep.  It's a comforting time.  It's an amazing moment of bonding that I will cherish for years to come.

Yesterday my buddy Clyde Joshua came over while I was cleaning out the garage and it reminded me of when Moira was very little.  He was walking around asking questions, pointing at this or that, or laughing and running away when he thought I was going to 'get him.'  He would follow right in my footsteps and hand me this or that, and mimic the things I was doing.  Moira used to do that when she was very small.  In fact, she mimicked not just the good, but the bad.  Isn't that how kids learn to do the bad anyway?  Children remind us of that fact when they pull out those special words in front of grandma or at school.  They become their parents.  Sometimes I open my mouth and my dad pops right out...  That's a big responsibility!

Today's Gospel reminds us of that truth, and gives us a better option.  Jesus is always upsetting the cart.  He never walks away with people indifferent.  Either they love him or hate him, but they always make a choice, they are always challenged.  Today they are mad at him, again.   He has just equated himself with God!   Today we would just kind of laugh if someone did that... "they're crazy!"  It was very serious to his contemporaries.   Serious enough they had him killed for it right?  Then he goes on to speak that truth, that children do what their parents did.

Amen, amen, I say to you, the Son cannot do anything on his own,

but only what he sees the Father doing;

for what he does, the Son will do also.

There is that pesky Amen, Amen again.  Remember, in the Semitic languages often there are no superlatives. (Good, better, best would be "good" "good good" "good good good", brings a whole new meaning to Holy, Holy, Holy eh?)  Amen means that what he is saying is truth.  It has that connotation of this has been confirmed, it has been supported, it is upheld as the truth.  So to say Amen and Amen.. he's saying this is the truth of the truth!  It's as if Jesus is saying "Pay attention to what I am about to say!"  Then he goes on to affirm that notion that as the Son he mimics his Father.. he follows in his footsteps.  If God raises the dead? So does Christ.  If the Father heals the sick? So does the Son.   If He frees the captor and forgives sin?  Well so will Jesus himself.

That brings an amazing level of depth to that reading from Isaiah in which God lists off a litany of the things he will do to bring his people back to him, back to freedom, back to love.  He declares he will feed them, give them drink, protect them from the elements and never forsake them.  Regardless of what they ever do he will always remember them.  That's a powerful promise to us today as well.  God wants us to be in relationship with Him.  Jesus himself is offering a personal invitation to each and everyone of us to be in this amazing personal covenant, not just a private one with God alone but in communion with his entire Body, the Church.
That begs the question for those of us who claim to be a part of that Body though... If children mimic their parents, then who can we claim as ours?  When I was young my daughter would follow me around, just as Clyde Joshua did yesterday.  The words I used? She used.   The things I did? She did.  The places I went? She went.  I was just telling my friends last night that Saturday of last week I had a bad day.  You know those days when you wake up and the world seems off kilter?  I couldn't get out of this bad funk.  I was snappy.  I was rude.  I was a jerk.   I stormed around like some monster seeking to destroy an enchanted forest.   My wife and kids took the brunt of it.  If anyone had seen me that day, would any of them been convinced I was a Catholic at all? Probably not.   I wasn't acting like my Father at all.

How then do we know how to act?  We emulate the Son.  He healed the sick, he cured the blind, he fed the poor and hungry, he offered forgiveness and compassion to all he met, and above all he proclaimed the Kingdom of God.  Are we doing that?  Do our actions show others that we are Children of the Most High?  Are we reaching out to the poor, the destitute, the widow, and the orphan?  Are we welcoming the strangers who come into our midst?  Are we building walls or bridges?  As we journey through the last remaining days of our desert of Lent, let us take time to examine who we are... to draw closer to God... so that when people look at us, they can say "Now there is a child of God, there is a person who loves others!  There is someone I want to be more like."

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

If I could save time in a bottle....

In the first reading we see this very intriguing event.  Ezra has stood up in front of the people and read to them the Law of God.  As he read it to them they begin to weep and cry.  They were sad, scared.  They heard all the things they were supposed to be doing and realize they were so far from that.  Was there any hope?  Ezra comforts them and says get up, God is good! This is a day Holy to the Lord.  It's a feast. Go eat and enjoy!

Sometimes we have that reaction ourselves.  Jesus gave us the beatitudes to remind us that the ten commandments require detachment.  They require humility.  They require being more like Christ.  When we hear that.. when we are honest... sometimes we want to fall down on the ground and say.. I'm not worthy.  Who am I but a worm?  A sinful man, unworthy of your grace, unworthy of your love.  Satan helps with that doesn't he?   He whispers in your ear "remember that thing you did?  Remember those words you said?"  He wants you to think you aren't worthy.. he wants you not to accept God's mercy, God's love.

We have to be careful not to get to where God's mercy is never great enough.  We have to avoid simply having hellfire and brimstone preaching without the immense love and mercy of God.  God is not a hateful tyrant, stomping around upstairs just waiting for you to make a mistake.   He's not up there with an eraser, glaring in your direction like that teacher who hated you... just hoping he can erase your name from the Lamb's book of life.  No, he's a loving Father.  He has to chastise because he is just and true, but he takes no savor in doing so.  He does not hope you will fail.. he longs for you to soar with the eagles.

At the same time we have to avoid God becoming buddy Jesus.  We cannot see God as only love without justice, only mercy without righteousness.  He is both and, not either or.  He offers the grace, but if we do not accept it, he is bound by who he is, by his own very nature, to have no choice but to punish us.  We choose that, you know?  God never chooses bad for us, but how often do we out of our own sinful ignorance and concupiscence choose that which is not for our own good? Too often.

That's why Jesus came to die for us.  To make us part of the Body of Christ.  Each of us is entirely and utterly unique.  No one can do anything like you can do it.  No one has the same skillset, same thought patterns, same exact life... only you are you.. and God loves you entirely.  So much so that he wants you to be a part of His body, a part of Him.  He wants us to work together to form one working organism... with millions of unique jobs to be done.  He's calling you to be a part of that..  To be a part of His Church, because it needs you.  Somewhere there is a job to be done... whether in the church itself through Holy Orders, in the service at the mass, or out in the world witnessing with your work ethic and joyful attitude. 

How do we get there though? On our own we have trouble always being joyful, don't we?  We are supposed to be bringing life into the world.. but too often we bring the opposite.  We tear down.  We yell.  We get angry.  The Key is in the responsorial Psalm.  You're words, Lord, are spirit and life.  There it is.. the key.. The Word of God is life itself... It is in receiving that Word, in internalizing it, in allowing it to change us.. that we become more like God.. we become life givers, not takers. We become lights, not darkness.  That doesn't mean you lose your uniqueness.  God doesn't make you into another clone, another zombie... he says to you, You are my unique child and I love you.  I don't expect you to do things the same as everyone else.. but I long for you to share my life giving love with others in your own unique way. 

He has given us the beatitudes to follow.  To show us how to be that life giving person.  These call us to detachment.  They call us to righteousness.  They call us to love.. But more importantly they call us to Christ.  They describe perfectly the man of Christ.   They describe Christ on the cross.   A man who was happy.  A man who was detached.  A man who cared for others, despite his own circumstances.   A man fully given to God's will and mission, while still being completely unique.  They very Son of God.

It is in receiving Him, Christ, that we can even hope to have the grace of taking up our own unique crosses.  We as Catholics believe that the Eucharist is that person.  It's not a thing. Not an it.  Not just bread.  Rather, it is truly the substance of Christ, Body, Soul and Divinity.  When we go to Mass we are truly receiving the Living Word of God.  We get fed from the table of the Sacred Scriptures and the table of the Sacrifice of the Mass.  Two liturgies, one table.  Two different bites, one single dish.  Heaven kisses earth and we are lifted up to be with God, with the Angels and Saints in Heaven.  We come into God's presence, we are brought face to face with Christ on Calvary. 

I imagine for some that's as shocking as what Jesus did in the gospel when he proclaimed to the people that He was who Isaiah spoke of 400 years ago.. the Christ.. the Messiah.. the one to liberate the people.   Then, he backed it up. He performed all those things which he read about. 

The Spirit of the Lord is upon me,
because he has anointed me
to bring glad tidings to the poor.
He has sent me to proclaim liberty to captives
and recovery of sight to the blind,
to let the oppressed go free,
and to proclaim a year acceptable to the Lord.

That promise was not just to them... but to you and I.  He comes to us today in the Eucharist and says to you:  Are you poor?  Is your spirit lacking?  Is there something you need in our relationship?  Let me fulfill you.   Are you captive to some sin?  Is there something in your life holding you back from giving yourself to me 100%?  Let me free you.   Are you blind to my love for you?  To my presence in your life?  Is it too hard for you to see my hand at work in your life?  Believe in me and I will open your eyes.  Are you oppressed?   Is there something pushing you down?  Is your own ego or addiction a tyrant keeping you from accepting my mercy? My child let me be your salvation.

Today is the Sabbath, the daily Holy to the Lord.   I challenge though that all days, all moments, every second.. is Holy to the Lord.   God himself entered time in the person of Christ and through his presence has sanctified to God every thing.  Every moment was created for you.   Every second of your life a gift.  Christ came to proclaim to you a lifetime of forgiveness.  A lifetime of freedom.   A lifetime of joy and gladness.  Are you ready to accept it?  Are you ready to be filled with joy?  Start with the Eucharist today.  Live the beatitudes.   They will draw you closer to Christ and Christ will show you that indeed, "Today this Scripture passage is fulfilled in your hearing."

It's almost as if Christ is singing to you that Old Jim Croce song:

If I could save time in a bottle
The first thing that I'd like to do
Is to save every day till eternity passes away
Just to spend them with you

How about you?  If you could save every moment of your life in a bottle.. and relive them... would you relive them for God?  The Bible is our love story.. Christ is our lover.. we are the beloved... Is he enough for us?  Every time we choose something else... well, we have become spiritually poor.  We have become blind.  We have become oppressed.  We have become idolaters.  Even then.. even when we have fallen once more... like a concern parent he reaches out to us and tries to help us up... and he calls out.. and says.. I still love you.. come back to me.  I am right here.. I have come to bring liberty, freedom, and joy... let me free you and love you.

His servant and yours,

Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

Even the Demons believe, and tremble.

In yesterday's post I talked a little bit about what it means to be in Ordinary time.  I mentioned  Ordinary Time was not a plain, boring time of emptiness just waiting for another Holiday or penitential season to come along. Rather, it is an ordered time, a time in which we bring ourselves into order with God himself through Christ, the fullness of his revelation.   Which means we need to pay particular attention to what the Church is showing us in each of the daily readings, in light of the Sunday Gospels surrounding them.

Tomorrow's reading begins with a typical day in the life of Christ.  It seems rather simple indeed for us who have been hearing about Jesus for the majority of our lives.  When we take a closer look though we see some very interesting things.  Last Sunday we celebrated the Baptism of Jesus Christ.   Mark has this as the focal point, the beginning of Jesus public ministry.  What he was doing before this we can only speculate.  The last time we have heard about him in the Sacred Scriptures he was lost in the temple at the age of twelve.  Now here he is, thirty years old, and beginning to teach publically.

Next Sunday we will see the wedding of Cana.  Another major event, in which we see the first real miracle occur in his ministry, being given at the request of the Virgin Mother, Mary.  In between these we find Mark leading us to a fuller understanding of who Jesus is.   Mark is bringing our time into order, systemically showing us who he believes Jesus to be.  That is the point of his gospel.  As we go through Ordinary time then, we aren't just sitting back and waiting, hearing quaint stories.. we are having an unfolding, an opening of understanding into the Mystery of the Incarnation of Christ.

Today, we see Jesus calling his disciples.  They leave immediately and begin to follow him.  That unveils Jesus as a teacher, as a Rabbi.   He is also apparently very charismatic for someone to give up their livelihood to immediately go and learn at his feet.  Then today we see him entering the synagogue and teaching.  He is also casting out demons.   Both of these are things which were already being done.  Teachers of the Law, both Scribes and Pharisees, already taught in the synagogues.  There were already exorcists in the temple.  There was something different about this Jesus though.  He didn't call on the authority of other teachers or writers, he didn't call on the name of another exorcists, he taught of his own authority and cast out demons of his own power. 

Mark is leading us further into the story.  He is drawing us closer to Easter.  He is saying, This Jesus was something more.   He wasn't your run of the mill Rabbi... rather there was something special.  Something different about him. In fact, in the very exorcism itself we see a name called out.  The demon said, "I know who you are, the Holy One of God."  We are beginning to see Jesus as God's anointed, as the one consecrated to God to lead his people out of bondage of sin and through the desert into the land God has promised.  We see the close of this Gospel showing Jesus fame spreading throughout the surrounding region.  This fame becomes a hindrance later as we see the Pharisees plotting to get rid of him because too many are beginning to follow him.

Isn't that what Epiphany was all about, right?  The revelation of who Jesus Christ is.  Something important to remember is Epiphany sets the tone of our year, it's not just a single event, but a reminder.   It is a reminder.  God has revealed himself fully to mankind through this God-man, Jesus Christ.  We continue to experience and unfolding of this divine manifestation throughout the year, growing ever more in faith, understanding, and hope.   So let's pay attention to the next few weeks, carefully asking ourselves, how does this next reading further reveal God to me?  And, how can that revelation and apply to my own life?

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

Gone Fishing.

Ah, with tomorrow's readings we start back into Ordinary Time.   Our English language makes that sound dry and bland, plain.  The dictionary gives it the synonyms of normal, common, routine... But that isn't what Ordinary time is about.  The etymology of the word though, ordinalis,  shows us that the word has more the connotation of being 'ordered.'  That is time that is being counted, time that is ordered to something.  Ordinary Time then is a time in which we are heading toward something, or maybe more accurately, an event or a someone. 

Ordinary time begins right after the Christmas season.  After we have spent weeks celebrating the birth of Christ, we then celebrate his Baptism, which marks the beginning of his earthly ministry.  Then we begin to count, we are ordering time... drawing towards something.   The next event will be Lent, and then Easter.   That means Ordinary time is leading us toward Christ.  It is leading us, ordering us, guiding us, toward his death, and his resurrection.  That's what Easter is about.  It's about not just death, for that would be very gruesome on it's own.   Rather, it leads us through death and into eternal life. 

Then we celebrate Easter for a good amount of time, another octave.   Then back to ordinary time.  Time that is leading us, ordering us towards another event.  That event is the Parousai, the end of the liturgical year reminds us of the end of time.  It reminds us that Jesus has promised to come again.  When he does he will usher in a new creation, a new heaven and earth.  The judgement day.  Then we start again with Advent, leading to the birth of Christ.

What do we learn from this repeated ordering of time?  We learn that our lives should be lived in an ordered fashion.  First thing God did with the universe?   He brought order out of Chaos.  He sent his Holy Spirit to put things in order.   We too must order time to God.  Our lives, our spirits, should be ordered toward Christ.   That's what the Liturgical year is in place to remind us of.   That being disciples of Christ means ordering our lives, patterning them after his.  It means taking time throughout the year to contemplate the mysteries of his birth, life, death, and resurrection... to remind us that he will come again and that we must be ready for it.

What do we do in the mean time?  How should we act?  How should we behave?  Tomorrow's Gospel is a very powerful one to start this time, to begin ordering our lives toward Christ.  Jesus calls his first two disciples.  He tells them to follow him, and he will make them fisher's of men. They immediately left their nets, their family, their livelihood, and followed Him.   That's our first example.  We are to listen to our call, and immediately begin living it.    Yes, that's what ordinary time is about.  It's not about counting down till the time we will begin to live our faith.. it's living our faith in an ordered, Godly fashion, as we head toward our own Easter.

You and I have something very much in common.  We all will eventually die.   Some of us sooner.  Some of us later.   It is appointed unto man, once to die and then the judgement.  That's what Ordinary time is about.  So here I am, like Father Ev Hemann, whom I have named this blog after; living my life in Ordinary time.. anticipating my own Easter, and longing for the end of time where all of creation will be redeemed for our Heavenly Father. 

So I leave you instead with the link to a blog that speaks of Ordinary Time in a way that I can never match, in a way that changed my own personal walk and my own understanding of this season of the church.    I pray it touches you, as it touched me:  Ordinary Time.

His servant and yours,

Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

Where's the bread?

Refugee Holy Familyby Angel Valdez

The readings for today could not be more apropos for so grand a Saint as Saint John Neumann.  To be a Saint means to have embodied what it is to live the Christian life faithfully and in imitation of Christ.  This Saint did so in a powerful way that should inspire each of us to live more fully the calling we have received and taken up in our Baptism.  We are indeed the body of Christ.  We should be reaching out to the poor, the down trodden, the alien, the refugee. Have we forgotten that in our affluent society?  Mayhaps even all of us are taken with a bit of this 'afluenza' that is so conveniently tossed around as a medical condition these days?

In the first reading we see this powerful line: Whoever is without love does not know God, for God is love.   How poetic and difficult this one line is to hear.  Jesus challenged us to love not just our friends, not just our family, not just those who are good to us.. but even those who are our enemies, those we cannot stand, those who turn our stomach into a wrestling ring for our dinner.  Yet, if we do not know love.. we do not know God. 

Then we see an image of Christ's love in the Gospel, the feeding of five thousand.  Christ asks his disciples to give them food to eat, and they remind of that old Wendy's commercial, "Where's the beef?"  “Are we to buy two hundred days’ wages worth of food and give it to them to eat?”  "Where are we gonna get that kind of bread Master?"  Here they are with God himself and still haven't figured it out.  Jesus, the Word, has already equipped them with everything they need to feed this crowd.   They've seen him cast out demons, heal the sick, bring the dead to life, calm the storms.  He has proven himself the master of all, from the body to nature itself.  Then he says something as simple as 'feed my flock' and they wonder how it can be done.  Jesus of course already knew the answer, and his command over the very laws of nature itself is demonstrated for the glory of God in the multiplication of loaves... taking what would normally only feed a few souls and feeding thousands with more left over than that which he started with.

When Saint John Neumann came to America to be ordained a priest, the church he was assigned over had no steeple or floor.   That did not deter him.  Even though his Parish stretched across an amazing distance, from Western New York to Lake Ontario, he travelled on foot to visit the coal miners, the sick, the immigrant.  When he found that a great deal of his congregation spoke Gaelic, and remember this is a time of severe persecution for the Irish immigrant, he learned the language himself that he might hear their confessions.  He who had been given the Bread of Life, took it directly to the people, celebrating Mass with them even at times on their own kitchen tables.

That's what you and I are called to do, in the means of our own vocations.  You see, love is not love without another.  One can say they love themselves, but that is truly ego.  Love is love when it is given.  That is why we believe God to be a trinity... because God is love.  Yet, even though the Father and the Son loved one another, so much so that it became another person, that love was not held on to for just themselves.   No, it poured out.. it overflowed... it came out into the universe, creating and building... for us.  A love that to this day calls out to us and seeks us, asking us to become one with it.  God sent his only-begotten Son into the world so that we might have life through him.  God wants us to be partakers of his divine essence, to live for eternity with Him, to become like Him.   We have received that promise thorugh Baptism, been strengthened through Confirmation, and renew our covenant and relationship with him through the Sacraments.   That's not all though. It doesn't end there.

Jesus said, “Give them some food yourselves.”   He multiplied the bread, but he expected the Disciples to provide it.  He multiplies our love, but he expects us to provide it.   Just like Saint John, we must journey out into the world and start providing the bread.   We must reach out with what we have been given, and share it with those who do not have it.  This is on both a physical and spiritual level.  We not only need to share the Word, reaching out to those who do not know Christ, and inviting them into a relationship with him; but we also have to share those blessings we have been given with the world. 

It's so easy to forget that there are those out there who do not have.  In a time of celebration, in a time that is often excessive and gluttonous, there is often a feeling of comfort and joy; and there should be.  We cannot forget the people who have no such comfort.  Christmas of all times is a reminder of refugees, of people fleeing a repressive regime, of a man and woman with a new born child, who are journeying into a country not their own.  Have we forgotten them?  We must ask ourselves, are we looking for the Holy Family?  Do we continue to seek Christ as he seeks a safe place to live?  Remember, at the end of time we will not be judged on degrees, certificates, or eloquence of speech, for not even Moses had that.  What we will be judged on is: when I was naked, did you cloth me?  When I was hungry did you feed me?  When I was thirsty did you give me drink?  When I was in prison did you visit me?

At the end of Mass we are given a sending, a message from the Church to it's body... It is not a time to go home and go back to a normal worldly life.  It is a calling from Christ to go forth, and glorify God with your life.  It is a calling for you to reach out to the alien, the widow and the orfan.  It is Christ saying, "Give them some food yourselves."   He will take your meager offering and turn it into a feast worthy of a King.

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

Time Travel

This is a thought that I shared with a friend many years ago before becoming Catholic, but has developed even further over time.  Another friend and I were just sharing in a blog comment and I wrote it out there.   Our conversation was about reverence for the Eucharist, about being aware of what is happening when you go up to receive Christ. 

I think people underestimate the power of what they are receiving. Back when I was in high school studying physics, there was a little side bar in the book. It said something about how much energy it takes to go from the speed of sound to the speed of light. The equation went something like N for initial velocity, N+1 for this speed, N+2.... by the time it got to almost the speed of sound it was an astronomical amount of energy expended.

Then it said to go from that speed (almost to speed of light) to the speed of light would require the sum of all previous energy expenditures added together. An 'infinite' amount of energy would be required to move beyond the speed of light (aka time travel.)

Think about that for a minute. We as Catholics believe that Viaticum is food for the journey.. the journey from this life to the next. From being here, present in time, to there with God outside of time. To move beyond time requires infinite energy.. and all of it is present right there in the Eucharist.

Wow... in that one bite, that one morsel is all of Jesus Christ, all of his body, soul and divinity. Do we really think of that before we consume Him?  He has crossed all time and space to allow you to receive Him, bringing that moment in history, bringing you and everyone else present to the foot of Calvary to be a part of that one event, not a new sacrifice, but making that one sacrifice present again.  Not a symbol, but literally to 're-present' that event.  Do you realize what He has done for you?  Does our reverence and behavior at Mass show that we truly believe it?  It is awe inspiring.  Do we let it inspire that awe in us?

His servant and yours,
Brian

The Bears Win!

Today's readings are quite intense.  Since we are less than a day away from Advent it would be expected that the intensity grows, and so it does!  We see all these strong apocalyptic images of great beasts rising up and devouring, and then falling away to the next beast.  What are these images about?  Apocalyptic literature is always kind of scary and many people spend the majority of their lives trying to find out who these people are, not just in the past but some try to interpret them as in the present.  The point of the literature, though it can be prophetic and often was, is to point to righteousness and faith being the key to redemption.  They almost always end with the judgement seat of God and the end of time.

The lions, tigers and bears (oh my!) represent strength and characteristics of kingdoms to come and go.   Just as you and I would be scared if a bear walked into our living room, let alone a bear with three large tusks; so too was the imagery intended to convey a message.  That message is that these kingdoms that are coming and going are very powerful, savage and cruel.  They all fall though.  This scene in Daniel ends with the coronation of the Son of Man coming on the clouds.  Jesus is in charge.  These kingdoms, despite their power and guile, will all fall away.. the only Kingdom that reigns forever is that of the Messiah, of the Christ.  This is the promise of the Davidic throne, this is the promise to us through Christ, the only begotten Son of God. 

Then we see this interesting parable that talks about figs, and signs of the times.  Just like in the apocalyptic literature we see symbols of what is going on in the world politically at the time, we see Jesus teaching us to keep our eyes and ears open.  He talks about the fact that we see the buds of the fig trees ready to burst forth and that shows us that summer is almost here, so too should we keep our minds open for the coming of Christ.  He also taught us though, that only the Father will know that day.  So what does he mean?  He means to be vigilant.  To be ready.

I was trying to learn more about figs earlier today, to see how this parable could apply to my life.  I grew up helping to tend bee hives occasionally.   I had heard quite a bit about bees and how they pollinate the food we eat, helping things to grow and reproduce.  I did not know that wasps also for some plants do the same thing.  Figs have a special kind of wasp that not only pollinates the fruit but also lays it's eggs there.  The queen crawls into the fig, lays her eggs, in the process pollinates the inside of the fruit, and then she dies.  She is consumed by the fig. 

That's a strange relationship.  The thing is, if you ask me about wasps I truly think of them as a terror.  Compared to bears, lions, eagles... a wasp is much scarier to me.  I don't know why.  Their little faces make me think of pure evil.  That to me is the lesson I take from this whole situation.  I think of the wasp as evil, as those things inside of me that get in the way of me letting God have complete control.  Just like the fig I often think these things are for my good.  I let them crawl around inside, not really asking what to do with them.  The fig teaches us a lesson though.  When we have those things inside we need to dissolve them.  We need to let the Jesus inside of us consume those things, drive them out... leaving nothing but the fruit inside. 

I think that's our lesson.  As the liturgical year ends, our minds begin to think of the end of time.  We don't know when that will come.  We don't know exactly what that will look like, or what it means for us to transition from life to eternity.  What we do know is that we need to be ready.  We need to let the Holy Spirit scatter the darkness in our hearts until nothing is left but the sweetness of His fruits.  As my dear friend Kenn often says, "Get ready, be ready, stay ready."  Don't wait till tomorrow, don't simply watch for signs of things to come.. but be ready regardless of what is happening.  Don't let your lamp go empty, keep the fuel handy at all times.

His servant and yours,
Brian

The Noble Heading to Another Country

In today's Gospel there is this interesting parable.  Last night when reflecting on the Gospel, I was drawn to the gold coins and what they represent.  Today though it struck me, that this was a very important key to that whole exchange.

While people were listening to Jesus speak, he proceeded to tell a parable because he was near Jerusalem and they thought that the Kingdom of God would appear there immediately. So he said, “A nobleman went off to a distant country to obtain the kingship for himself and then to return.

Why is this important to understanding the truth of the parable? I think it is in the key of who Jesus is, and not who they thought he was going to be.  As in the first reading, the Jewish people were well aware of the fact they were still under oppression from Roman rule.  They had been beaten down for many, many years.  Here they were expecting deliverance.  They wanted to see God fulfill that promise he made to David when he said, "And your house and your kingdom shall be made sure for ever before me; your throne shall be established for ever." 

How confusing it must have been for the people who thought that Israel would have a king forever.  Then not only did they lose their king, but they also lost Jerusalem itself.  It was destroyed completely and they were carted off into captivity.  Trying to make sense of that they began to develop the theology of the Messiah.  It was he they were waiting for.  It was he they thought Jesus to be, and they were right in thinking so.  The problem was they expected him to be a military leader.  Just like David of old, like the judges, someone to rise up against their enemies, and rebuild the kingdom.  King David's kingdom was a time of unrivaled prosperity.  Everyone had everything they needed, food, wealth, etc.   It was what they longed to be returned to. 

Here was Jesus approaching Jerusalem and the people around him thought the Kingdom of God was about to be manifest.  Even though Jesus had been telling them over and over that he would have to go into Jerusalem and die, they thought he was going to rise up as King and overthrow Israel's political enemies.  So Jesus tells us this parable.  What does it mean though?  Well, Jesus is the nobleman in the story.  Jesus is warning them that what they think is going to happen, is not exactly what is going to occur.  He has to go to another country, he has to journey back to where he came from, that is to Heaven, in order to become King.  

This parable is all about his crucifixion.   He is also telling us what we must do while he is gone.  That's where the gold coins come in, and that's where my blog from last night starts off.  (Are you ready to give an account?)   Are we ready to show Him when he returns as king what we have done with his gifts?   As we approach the end of the liturgical season we are reminded through our readings that one day will come the end of time.  That at that end of time we will be called forward to give an account of what we have done with the things God has given us.  As we approach this weekends Mass, let us prepare ourselves for an encounter with Christ the King. 

He has gone to prepare a place for us.  Are you ready?  Get ready.   Be ready.  Stay ready.

His servant and yours,

In Christ,

Brian

Taking a Stand

Tomorrow's readings are quite interesting.  The reading from the book of Maccabees shows us the story of an elderly man who is being forced to go against his religion.  During this time Antiochus Epiphanes was persecuting the Jews and trying to force them to join a state sanctioned religion.  Antiochus wanted to unite his kingdom by creating a common religion, getting rid of anything foreign or different.  Eleazar was a Jew, and they were forcing him to eat pork.  This was abhorrent to him.  He spit it out and was condemned to death for doing so.  His friends tried to convince him that he should hide some kosher meat in his pocket and when they wanted to see him eat the pork, slip some of the kosher stuff in and pretend.

Eleazer realized that by doing something like that, those who saw him might think he actually ate the pork.  He did not want to become a stumbling block to others causing them to fall as well, so he refused.  Then his friends turned angry.  They not only felt he was crazy for dying for his faith, but they probably felt inside the conviction that they had failed to do the same.  We often see that with many things in life.  One of the sayings in Wisdom we studied the other day is that a good man is often seen as obnoxious to those around him.  Just his presence can cause those who are living wrong to feel convicted.

Have you seen that before?  You are standing talking to someone who knows you are religious and they drop the F-bomb, and then they apologize to you for doing it in front of you?  Or they send you an email, an email they'd have no problem to send that email to anyone else, then you get another email blushingly declaring their sorrow for having offended you.  People see those who are doing what they believe to be right, and they begin to feel convicted, even if you never say a word. 

I think that is part of the message we see in the Gospel reading too.  Zaccheus has just done something most others aren't willing to do.  He took a stand, literally up in a tree!  He went up to where he needed to be to encounter Christ.  In the process Christ comes to his house and declares that Zaccheus has received salvation this day!  Before he hears this though, Zaccheus does something that shows he has had a change of heart.   He declares “Behold, half of my possessions, Lord, I shall give to the poor, and if I have extorted anything from anyone I shall repay it four times over.” 

Many people later condemned Jesus for this sort of behavior.  For going into the homes of tax collectors and sinners.   I think for some of them they probably were a bit jealous too.  Not just of Jesus going to those homes instead of to theirs... but also of Zaccheus who did what they should have been doing.  I think that his actions caused conviction in their hearts.  Here was the 'other'.  Their they.  The sinner.  They were supposed to be holy.  Yet, they held on to their money with a tight fist.  Here was the one who they wanted to condemn and convict.. and he was giving up half of everything he owned!  How that must have stung their hearts? 

It struck me too that tomorrow is the feast day of Saint Elizabeth of Hungary.  Here is another person who took a stand.  She took her wealth and used it to help others.  Much like Zaccheus she had an open hand, often to the chagrin of those around her, giving away food and money.  When her husband died she renounced the world and went into serving Jesus full time. 

What can we learn from these two men and one holy woman?  I think we can learn a very important lesson.  First that we must take a stand, and second that sometimes the stand is not where we expect it to be.   All of Eleazer's friends expected him to take the easy way out.  They were willing to help him fool others so that his conscious was still clear, but that he would not have to die.  He took a stand.  He died for his faith, for his God.  Society expected one thing, he went with God instead.

Zaccheus was a tax collector.  He had money, wealth, comfort.   Everyone who was like him probably expected him to just stay wealthy, they thought him crazy for giving it all up.  Those who were 'religious' saw him as the sinner.  The last thing they expected from a man like him, the chief of the tax collectors, was conversion and generosity.  He took a stand. Society expected one thing, he went with God instead.

Saint Elizabeth was a princess, rich and wealthy.  She was queen by the age of 14.  Everyone would have expected her to have others do her bidding.  Even in her generosity, they might have expected her to hand the money out or to send a servant to deliver it.  Instead we hear legends of her running out of the palace towards the commons with her apron full of loaves of bread!  Society expected one thing, she went with God instead.

We have a unique opportunity today.  With everything going on in the world, from France to Africa, we see people in need.  There is a great level of fear towards those refugees.  Some of them could very well be plants, people who wish harm to others.  Others though are just mothers, fathers, daughters, sons.  People in need.  Starving and simply trying to get away from persecution.  Society wants us to turn our backs on all of them.  They want us to simply desire our comfort, stay where we are, and protect ourselves.  Part of me wants to fear too.   Part of me wants to say, you know?  I want to protect my family, my country, my friends.  I do.  At the same time, there are other people out there who need food. Who need shelter.  Who need love.   Society wants us to do one thing.. but what does God want us to do? 

I don't have an answer for you.. but I do know this.  Sometimes, like Zaccheus, we need to get a change of perspective.  If we truly want to see Jesus, we need to climb a tree.  We need to change our vantage point because down here on earth, we simply cannot see him for all the other things in our way.  We need to spend time opening our hearts to Jesus.  During this time of thanksgiving, as we approach a holiday in which we are to give thanks for all that we have... recall that the very word Eucharist means 'thanksgiving.'  Spend more time in prayer, receive the sacraments as frequently as possible, and seek out some time alone with Christ in adoration.  Ask him to come to your house today, and try to see this situation from a different view point.  We have so much to give thanks for... how would we feel if our world was taken out from under our feet?  If our children were starving?  If we feared for our lives and all of the countries that might offer us a glimmer of hope had closed their borders, leaving us with no where to turn? 

His servant and yours,
In Christ,
Brian

Know That He is Near

A reflection on the readings for the 33rd Sunday of Ordinary time. 

Many years ago when I was a young man in college, the power had gone out in the entire neighborhood.  I decided to walk to my mothers house for dinner.  I knew that no matter what, she and my father would be prepared for the dark.  They'd have a fire or something going and be cooking somehow.  I don't remember why I chose to walk instead of drive, maybe I didn't have a car at the time.  That was often the case back then with only one car and two people working. 

I remember stepping out into the moonless night, with no lights on anywhere.  At first it was so dark I could see nothing.  I even recall putting my hands out in front of me as I walked, as if I were recently blinded and trying to find my way along with my fingers.  Stumbling through the dark I was completely unable to see.  Oh how dark things seemed.  I remember jumping at sounds in the woods, flinching at what I thought might be a snack or animal in the road.  I eventually began to adjust to the dim light of the stars and began to make out the true details of my surroundings.  By the time I actually got to my parents home my eyes had adjusted, and I could see decently in the dark.  How bright the candles seemed when they opened the door to me, even enough to be painful to my eyes. It was warm though, welcoming, even wanted!

To me, this is what Apocalyptic literature is like.  It seems dark at first.  Even a bit scary.  The end goal of it is not to scare you though.  It is not to place you in darkness, but to help you find a warm, welcoming light at the end. When I was a protestant years ago these readings made me a bit scared, even enough that I often scanned the news and the radio looking for 'signs', constantly worrying about the second coming and the 'rapture.'  I no longer worry about these things.  Why?  Because the second coming is not something to be scared of.  It's something to long for.  It's something to pray for, and be ready for every day.

I think that like the dark night I stepped out into, we too are walking in a dark night now.  Our eyes in this world are used to the amount of light that is here.  The sun, the moon, the stars... all of these are the light we have become accustomed to.  In my mind and heart, that is what Jesus is talking about when he says "the sun will be darkened, and the moon will not give it's light."  That at the second coming, when the brilliance of the Son of God is revealed, the rest of the light we are used to will be so dim that it will not even be of relevance.  Like that candle in my mom and dad's house, his light will be so bright that if I were to even think of stepping back into the star lit world it would be so dark my eyes would not longer even pick out the details.  I'd be stumbling in the dark again, holding my hands out before me for fear of falling.

The thing is though, we do not have to be fearful of that day, nor even to wait for that day to have our world illuminated.  While, yes, Jesus Christ will be coming again at the end of time, he's already here among us now.  We can draw closer to God daily, through the Sacraments, through His Church, and through each other.  This is a beautiful thing, but also like the scene above, has a truth that should be cautioned.  The closer you get to the light, the darker 'darkness' is.  The closer you draw to Jesus Christ in this life, the more your sin will seem.  Things that seem small now will stand out much, much more as you draw nearer to the source of all holiness.

When I was working in the construction field one of the first things I liked to do was hang the lights.  I'd even hang them before a ceiling was anywhere near in place.  Using temporary wiring I would try to have the entire building lit up brightly before even the floor was poured.  This was great for people working, giving them plenty of light to work with.  It also brought out every imperfection, even speck of dust, and every 'mess' that someone left.   A counter that might seem clean in a dimly lit room can turn out to have quite a bit of crud when you truly light it up.  So too our souls. 

The devil will try to use that against you.  The closer you get to God, the more Satan will try to convince you that you do not deserve it.  He will try to convince you that God would never forgive you.  That little speck of dust will look so immense when compared to the brightness of God himself.  Don't let him draw you away from God and His mercy.  God will forgive you!  Draw closer to the light.   Seek the Sacraments.  Seek His face.  So that you may be among those who "shall live forever" and not those who "shall be an everlasting horror and disgrace."  Keep walking in the darkness of this light, searching for the light of Christ.  This is our hope as Christians!  That we might find our Father's house, and the place He has prepared for us.  That when the end of our time comes, we might be welcomed into His abode and be prepared for the light that will wash over us.  A light so bright that everything behind us will seem dim and dark, as the Sacred Scriptures affirm:

And there will be no more night; they need no light of lamp or sun, for the Lord God will be their light, and they will reign forever and ever. Revelation 22:5

His servant and yours,
In Christ,
Brian

Take Care

Such a simple line from tomorrow's gospel.  It really triggers some thoughts from the books I am reading, the scriptures I am studying, and even some of the discussions I've been a part of.  It's funny how the Holy Spirit works that way, eh?  "Take care and guard against all greed."   Jesus then goes on to talk about a man who doesn't have enough to store all that he has, so he makes grand plans to provide for himself so he can have a long and happy life.  Yet, that very night he is doomed to die.  Then who will have all the stuff he has stored up?  To who will that belong?

I think this is truly a call to stewardship.  I have been studying that a lot the past few years, and more especially for an upcoming class in Aspirancy formation.  What is Stewardship indeed?  Many think of it as tithing, as giving a part of your money.  Or just giving some of your time.  Those are involved in it, sure.  Stewardship is so much more.  Stewardship is giving of self.   It is giving everything you have, everything you are, everything you are to become... giving all of that to God for his Kingdom, and to your neighbor as you would yourself.

That's a tall order isn't it?  Pouring yourself out like a libation?  Giving of yourself so much that it hurts?  Blood sweat and tears!  Are we ready to do that?  Wow, how hard it is sometimes just to give up a few minutes of our time in prayer.   We sometimes get grumpy or angry when our kids want this or that, or our spouse demands this time or that time, when we had plans to do our own thing.  In the long run, God calls us like this man in the Parable.  He says, you fool... tomorrow you could be called away.. what is most important?  God.  Family. Friends.   You see, I don't think the rich man in the parable had a problem because he was rich.  I think his problem became that he wanted more, and more.   Instead of giving away all this excess, instead of sharing it with his neighbors and friends... he wanted to build even bigger barns and storage bins.  Not so he'd have more to give away.. but so that he could party and relax. 

We are called to emulate our Lord Jesus Christ.  As the first reading says, Jesus was handed over for our transgressions, and raised for our justification. In what ways can we do this in our daily life? Hand ourselves over for others?  Becoming stewards.  Not just of our talents.   Not just of our monetary treasures.   Stewards of our entire lives... time, friendships, creation, economic, political, every sphere that we are involved in should be for God.   Every action, every thing we put in our bodies, every thing we say, every purchase, every television show, every song, every breath, every thought and dream... should be for God's glory.. and for the benefit of mankind.   That is, we should be bringing God's kingdom here and now.   That is what being a Steward is.  Knowing that God has given you everything you have, even the very life coursing through your body.  Our response?   Giving it back to him.. in every way possible.

In Christ, His servant and yours,

Brian

28th Sunday in Ordinary Time: Wisdom From on High

Today was one of those amazing days where I got the honor of sitting in a group of men who are

offering their lives in hopes of eventually being configured to Christ to the servant in Holy Orders.  It struck me as I began to read the readings for tomorrow of how apropos they were after the experiences we shared today in that room.  The first reading from the book of Wisdom is just so powerful and reminds me of one of the very great philosophical reminders that Father Peck talked to us about today.

I prayed, and prudence was given me;
I pleaded, and the spirit of wisdom came to me.
I preferred her to scepter and throne,
and deemed riches nothing in comparison with her,
nor did I liken any priceless gem to her;
because all gold, in view of her, is a little sand,
and before her, silver is to be accounted mire.
Beyond health and comeliness I loved her,
and I chose to have her rather than the light,
because the splendor of her never yields to sleep.
Yet all good things together came to me in her company,
and countless riches at her hands.

Wisdom 7:7-11 NAB

How truthful is that?  I think we often don't understand the power that God has given us in the gift of reason and logic.   We take it for granted.   Do we hold it up as something precious?  Something so wonderful that it makes gold seem like sand?  That something quite rare is really just as common as the sand by the sea?   Do we long for wisdom more than our own health or beauty?   Today's society would teach us otherwise.  To choose to have wisdom over even light?   Are you so enthralled by the beauty of God's gift to us of prudence that you would give up your sight itself to be perfected in it's execution?

There is an allegory from Plato that Father Peck mentioned in his lecture that really puts things in perspective.  The Cave, in which people are chained to the wall unable to see anything or anyone, except for that which is right in front of their face.  They cannot see behind them or around them, but only the shadows cast by a fire and by objects held by people unseen.  That these people are unaware of the world outside because all they know is the shadows on the cave wall. Here we have these people in bondage, but are they aware of it?  Do they realize how much they need?  How much they haven't seen?

In freedom they find themselves open to a world of sight and sound that is so much more full of depth than anything they had thus experienced.  They feel sorry for those still trapped in the cave, and do everything they can to bring them out of the bondage.. out of the flat, one experiential existence.  Isn't that what wisdom is indeed?  Philosophy? Theology?  Opening our minds to a reality so far beyond what we first perceived with our limited senses?  Bringing us to understand something so much deeper than just the visible, but helping us to grapple and wrestle with the invisible?  In Wisdom we find hope, we find a world beyond just the shadows cast on the wall in our self imposed caves, but rather we open our minds to contemplate and experience things beyond ourselves. 

How does that apply to the gospel?  The church in her infinite wisdom and effort has attempted to tie the gospel and the first reading together thematically.  What do I see there?  In this parable Jesus talks of a young, rich man who wants to know what he must do to get to heaven.  The rich man says he has followed the commandments, and wants to know what more he must do?  Jesus tells him to sell all that he has and give it to the poor, then come and follow him.  The Scriptures then tell us that the "young man went away sad, for he had many possessions."   Then Jesus speaks of a camel passing through the eye of a needle.  We could really go deep into that imagery and what it might mean or what the words might mean, but suffice it to say that many times I have a hard time just threading a needle with regular thread... imagine doing it with anything larger? 

How does that mesh with the first reading?  Wisdom.   That is what Jesus was encouraging this young man to do, to increase his Wisdom.  You see the young man was trapped in his cave, in his own prison of viewing the world.  He was attached to the material wealth he had, enough that the thought of losing it made him sad.   Jesus was not condemning having possessions, nor even having wealth; but rather being attached to those things.   We was asking him to see the world of detachment, a world in which we are free of desire.   A world in which we are free of suffering, because we do not desire health, wealth, comfort, etc over God... but rather what consumes us most is God.  That is true Wisdom.  That is what Jesus offered to this young man.  He saw him shackled, looking at the wall of the cave, unable to see more than the shadows that Satan and the world offered him.   Jesus tried to free him and bring him outside the cave to see the real world, so full of color and sensation, something beyond what the rich mans mind was able to see.   Instead of coming outside, the young man simply sat in the cave looking at the wall. 

So what about us?   Are we ready to step outside the cave?   Are we ready to follow Christ with a growing detachment to worldly things and a thirst so enormous for God's presence in our lives that we would give up everything else for it?  That anything else, even the most precious gems and metals would seem like filth and refuge to us?  Thomas Aquinas said nearing the end of his life, ""The end of my labors has come. All that I have written appears to be as so much straw after the things that have been revealed to me."   Are we there?   Are we at least working to be there?

Lord I believe,
Help my unbelief.

In Christ,
Brian

Sept 11, 13 years later.

As I was doing my morning walk after getting my daughter on the bus, I began to listen to the office of readings. My mind began to wander as the Psalms were being read to me, and I began to meditate sincerely on this set of verses: 

O Lord, you have been our refuge

from one generation to the next.

Before the mountains were born

or the earth or the world brought forth,

you are God, without beginning or end.

You turn men back into dust

and say: “Go back, sons of men.”

To your eyes a thousand years

are like yesterday, come and gone,

no more than a watch in the night.

You sweep men away like a dream,

like grass which springs up in the morning.

In the morning it springs up and flowers:

by evening it withers and fades.

How fleeting mankind is, from moment to moment. The universe we believe to be billions of years old. Mankind itself thousands and thousands of years. The life of a tree in the multiple hundreds of years, the life of turtles and some reptiles beyond our capacity. Yet we have an inflated sense of ego. We believe we are so much more important than everything else, as if God saw something in us that deserved his love. Those who claim we cannot merit God's love, then seem to feel that somehow they earned it, by being man.

How little we truly are in comparison to the expanse of the universe, how fleeting we are. I pondered how that grass grows every year, but it's a new blade, the old having withered and died. The root is the same, but the blade is refreshed, new cells, new life. Much like humanity that continues on with or without us, blades that may or may not be remembered in the breath of time. Yet God loves us. What is man then that God is mindful of us? We don't deserve it. We are just grains of sand on a beach of time, being washed in and out of the shore. Will anyone remember me 10 years after I am gone? 20? 100? Or will I like the countless others be simply another leaf that has fallen from the tree of life, gone on into eternity but forgotten here. 

These are my thoughts on the memorial of 9/11... what are yours?