When Julie and I first got married I had no idea what a Sacrament was. Growing up in the mountains of Virginia I had never heard that word used inside of any of the Ecclesial Communities I had the privilege to attend. (click the link to read more)

Thursday of the Ninth Week in Ordinary Time

Lectionary: 356

TB 6:10-11; 7:1BCDE, 9-17; 8:4-9A

PS 128:1-2, 3, 4-5

MK 12:28-34

When Julie and I first got married I had no idea what a Sacrament was.   Growing up in the mountains of Virginia I had never heard that word used inside of any of the Ecclesial Communities I had the privilege to attend.    A marriage had always seemed like more of a contract to me than what I now know to be Holy Matrimony.   Scott Hahn once said, “A covenant differs from a contract almost as much as marriage differs from prostitution.”  That’s a bold statement.  It’s one I have come to agree with over the years though.  In a contract people exchange goods or services.  “I’ll give you 10 dollars, you give me that clock.”   A covenant is an exchange of people.  “I’ll give you me and you give me you.”  Nothing is held back.  Everything I am belongs to her and everything she is belongs to me.   All of this means very little unless God is involved.

That’s the beautiful thing about the example set forth by Tobiah and Sarah!   Even on their wedding night they stopped before consummating the marriage and went before God together in prayer.  When I first read that book during my conversion process I was astounded at the fact I had never really involved God in that particular area of my life.  The bedroom had always been a physical release between two people.  Yet, in the covenant with God He phrased it “I will be your God and you will be my people.”  All of me.   Every aspect.   Not just the parts that I want to share, but my entire life.   Praying at all times without ceasing.   Julie and I had some frank discussions after that.   Then we did something that many people react interestingly to when they find out about it.   We began to live as brother and sister.   We stopped being intimate with one another during our annulment process until we knew for sure that our previous marriages were not sacramental and that this one was.  We waited for the Church's approval, for God’s approval, before continuing to love each other in that way.

So many walk away from Church over sexual sin.   Be it that they have taken a vow of chastity and have decided they want to be intimate with someone, or that they want to have relations that the Church and natural law declare disordered; they decide that because they ‘love’ someone they should be able to love how they see fit.   Jesus reminds us today of something very important.   In the Gospel He says the greatest command is to love God.  Yes, love your neighbor is close to it and second, but the greatest is the very first one.  That means we put Him first even in our marriage, even the sacred act of the sacramental bond.   Saint Pope John Paul the Second wrote in the Encyclical Dives in Misericordia that “openness to Christ, who as the Redeemer of the world fully reveals man himself, can only be achieved through an ever more mature reference to the Father and His love.”   That is, the only way for us to truly know ourselves and be able to offer ourselves to another person in true love is the know the Father through knowing Christ.  That means putting Him first in all things, that we can then offer a gift of love to our spouses that flows from the love of God whose love for our spouse is beyond even the greatest love we have ourselves have to give.    That’s what I should want for my wife, that my love for her begin to resemble God’s love for her… the best love, because she deserves better than what I have to offer on my own.

His servant and yours,

Brian Mullins

"Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord, my rock, and my redeemer. - Psalm 19:14

Lead me into the desert....

When I first got out on my own life was pretty good.   I was working a job at minimum wage.  I had my own place.  My own car.  I had a phone, internet, and food in the fridge.  Then I got a job making twenty five dollars a day driving a bus going to college.   The bills were getting paid.   I was eating well and had many friends.   The summer after I got my Associates degree I decided to get a job as an electrician.   I started making quite a bit more money.   I soon forgot how good life was at the start and began to live at this new level of 'wealth.'

It wasn't long until the bills weren't getting paid.  I had a lot more stuff for sure.   I ate more, partied more, had even more friends.   My relationships were getting more shallow though as I sought more and more enjoyment.  I was making more money than I had ever had.   I had a new car, well new to me.  I had plenty of books, a top of the line gaming computer, high speed internet, and on and on.   I was unhappy though.  Relationships started to fall apart.   Bills stopped being paid.  After a break up with a girl I thought was the 'one,' I took a job with a travelling electrical company and began to go on the road.  I went back to simplicity.   Life was starting to look pretty good again, and it kept getting better. 

The first reading reminds me of that journey.   The Israelites met God in the desert of all places.   In a land where they had to count on Him for food and drink.   They had a relationship and journeyed together.   Then He took them into a land of abundance and immediately they began to put more and more into their lives.  They turned from the one who would give them living water and instead tried to find that fulfillment in things. Just as I had done in my years as a young adult, and just as we tend to do today, we constantly look for that thing which will make us happy.  Sitting around day dreaming about what we would do if we won the lottery instead of looking for the gift that is already there... God himself in the Sacraments. 

The thing about the Gospel to me is that every person heard the same parable, every person encountered the same Jesus.  The Disciples, though, sat at His feet.   They didn't just encounter on a superficial level.   They wanted to be closer, to learn more.   They asked questions.  They journeyed with Him.   That's what relationships are about.  Time spent together.   That is why that little verse from Hosea is so powerful: "So I will allure her, I will lead her into the desert." (Hosea 2:16) This isn't God trying to pull you into the sparse desert to die.. it's a lover wanting to take you back to the simple times.. to where we met... to the beginning of our relationships.. to the way things used to be.  It's God calling to us to have an authentic encounter.  To remove all those things from our hearts that stand in the way of receiving the one thing that fits, the one thing that matters.   To get rid of all these empty, meaningless things... and encounter Him: in the Sacraments, in Sacred silence, and in His most distressing of disguises... the poor, the widow, the orphan, the sick, the prisoner, the refugee, the sinner and the saint. 

His servant and yours, 

Brian 

"He must increase, I must decrease."

A reflection on the daily Mass readings for Thursday of the Sixteenth Week in Ordinary Time: June 21, 2016.  Jeremiah 2:1-3, 7-8, 12-13; Psalm 36; The Holy Gospel According to Saint Matthew 13:10-17

I am a grown man, I'll eat what I want to eat!

Take my yoke upon you and learn from me,
for I am meek and humble of heart;
and you will find rest for yourselves.
For my yoke is easy, and my burden light.
- Jesus

In my teens I attended an evangelical church that taught that these words meant that we were free to do anything and everything we wanted.   So I did.   If it felt good I did it, if it tasted good I ate it, if I wanted it? I took it.  That's freedom right? After all, freedom means being able to do whatever you want when you want, right?
 I want to defend myself and say "I wasn't a horrible person."   Yet, when I look back on some of the things I did I am not sure I can make that claim and be honest with myself.
True freedom is not being a slave to our passions and desires.   It means being able to say yes or no, regardless of what our minds or bodies tell us to do.  A person who is truly free can be chaste and avoid doing those things which his body desires.   They can avoid being a glutton, no more cake for me please, I've had enough.   They can walk into the flames of a fire to save another soul even though the pain of the burns they receive scream at them to run the other way.   That's true freedom, being disciplined enough and free enough to decide for yourself, regardless of what peer pressure, hormones, and all those other influences call for you to do.

The thing about a yoke that I did not realize as a teen is it is only easy when you go where it is leading you.  When we read that verse from Isaiah we see the path of the just is smooth and and level.  The just.  That is a person who lives out the justice of God, not a person who simply does what they wish.  When we go along with God's will, when we seek out that which is good and noble, that's when the yoke is easy and the burden is light.   That doesn't mean a bed of roses.   Today is the feast day of Saint Kateri Tekakwitha.  This young woman walked with the yoke of Christ on her shoulders.  In reward for it her people starved her, threw rocks at her as she went to church, and eventually she had to flee to a different area to live in peace.  In all of it, she went where Christ asked her to go.

The reason the yoke is so easy though is it's something we are innately wired to do.  Yes, there are those out there who have been broken by society, their parents, or traumatic experiences.  All of those are created in the image of God, we were born to live out the simple truth of God's justice: love.  When Moses spoke to the people earlier this week he said that the message we have received is not something lofty in the skies that we must beg a bird to go get it, nor is it something distant and hidden that we must send someone on a quest to find it, rather it is already on our tongues and written in our hearts.   We already know what is right to do, but we choose to do what is easy, what is comfortable.  Are you listening to God when he speaks to you?  Are you following the yoke when it pulls to the left or the right?  Or trying to forge your own path?

Saint Kateri Tekakwitha, pray for us.

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

A reflection on the daily Mass readings for Thursday of the Fifteenth Week in Ordinary Time, July 14, 2016. Isaiah 26:7-9, 12, 16-19; Psalm 102; The Holy Gospel According to Saint Matthew 11:28-30

Teen Angst and Broken Glass.

A Reflection on the daily readings for Monday, June 20th, 2016.

2 Kings 17:5-8, 13-15a, 18
Psalm 60
The Gospel According to Matthew 7:1-15

My mother and dad were good to me growing up.  Father's day reminded me of that.  To look back and see exactly what it was like growing up.  They were always there for me and gave me gifts other kids did not even have.  Most of my friends didn't have a car.  I had several that I was allowed to choose from to use.  I often took that for granted.  There was this one time that my mother asked me to take the garbage to the dump.   This was before curb side pickup for the whole county.  Back then they used to have a dumpster down by the bridge that crosses the lake.  I was so angry!  I wanted to do something else and she dared to ask me to do something before I went off to do my thing.  I stormed out, threw all the trash into the car they gave me, and sped all the way to the dumpster.   When there I threw the trash as hard as I could reveling in the sound of crunching glass, broken bags, and cracking debris.  Then I went to the hatch of the Bronco and slammed it as hard as I could. I had all the windows up.  I learned a very valuable lesson about air pressure in a closed environment.  The rear window shattered out in an explosion covering me with glass.

How could I explain this to my parents? I had destroyed the gift they had given me all because I was angry at being asked to do a small favor on my way to do something else.  The first reading from the Second Book of Kings reminds me of that.  God has given Israel everything.   He has saved them from slavery, delivered them to the promised land, sent messenger after messenger to tell them of His great love and mercy.  In return they continue to ignore his promise.  The Israelites at the time expressed it as God having "put them out of his sight."  We understand that more today as God was offering them an Amazing Grace and they were too stubborn to accept it.   My parents did not turn their back on me when I slammed the car trunk, they were rather offering me the use of the car and all that came with it, with a small request of just taking out the trash.  God never forgets us, He never stops offering forgiveness... but sometimes in our anger, in our frustration we refuse to take it.   We refuse to be faithful to the relationship and that grace is lost.. just like the glass of a window shattered in the antics of a frustrated teen.

Society reels from the impact of not receiving that grace.  We see it today in the actions of our government, youth, friends and families.  What was once considered taboo and personal is now lauded in the streets.  Religion is mocked and relegated to something you just do behind closed doors.  The things that were once considered perversions are now considered sacred and relegated to untouchable and one is labelled a bigot if they speak out against it.  Just like the Israelites they turn their back on the one true God and serve instead the God's of the enemy, the ones who encourage sexual impurities, incestual worship, and even child sacrifice.  The Psalm for today speaks of that reeling, that sense of lost.  That moment when we realize we are no longer being sheltered by God's grace and not because of His actions.  He is always faithful, but we, we often break the Covenant.

You have rocked the country and split it open;
repair the cracks in it, for it is tottering.
You have made your people feel hardships;
you have given us stupefying wine.

Doesn't that say it all? The thing about the Psalms is they often express that deep sense of loss, that deep regret of not having God on our side.. that longing in our hearts for a restoration of that relationship that makes us whole and complete.  Even those Psalms though always end with a declaration of hope, a trust and faith that if we return to the covenants, if we but plead with God with a contrite heart, then He will always be there to return to us.   Hope.

Christ is that fulfillment of hope. Even when all others are turning their back on Him, even when the northern tribes rejected His grace to the point that their enemies over threw them, God was there for Judah.  The remnant need not fear the enemy.   Christ is there for us always, but He requires something from us.  Relationship.  Faithfulness. Covenant fidelity.   He reminds us that first and foremost we are to be looking inward.   To examine our own steps to see if there are any 'specks' or splinters in our own eyes.  That means looking to see if we are right with God.   Are we in a proper relationship?   Or are we pushing God away and rejecting that grace?  Many of us are choosing to ignore the splinters.  Some small vice or some small addiction that we can't control.. and we excuse it.  "I'm not that bad."  "It's only this, at least it's not that."  "I can't help it, but God loves me."   He does indeed, but He challenges you to be better.  To be the person He created you to be.  That means being faithful to His commands, following the rules He established, in the way and through the authority He decreed.

That doesn't mean we never judge.   Too many quote the Gospel without the full message.   It means that we judge as God judges.  God is righteous and we deserve punishment.   He is also merciful and took the punishment Himself.   That's how we judge, with righteousness (truth) and with mercy (love.)   We cannot express a God who is only one or the other.  If God is only the righteous judge, then only the perfect will ever enter Heaven.. and how many of us are that?   If God is only merciful then the Gospel becomes pointless, everyone is going to Heaven so why bother evangelizing at all?  Rather we must judge with both, but only after looking inward and getting rid of even the smallest of splinters.

The thing about a splinter is that it festers.   It irritates and either you remove it?  Or it becomes more serious.  Infection can set in, gangrene, a lost toe or finger, a limb?   Where do we draw the line?  We don't allow it to grow.. we remove it as fast as possible.  That for us spiritually means frequent reception of the Sacraments, even the most under used and often despised Sacrament of Reconciliation.   That Sacrament is a beautiful encounter with Christ Himself in which He offers to restore you to the right relationship with the Father, that we may be one as They are one.   Not only does He remove the splinter of sin by forgiving all sin, but through the penance offered He encourages us to safeguard from getting another in it's place.  We have to grow though!  We have to go forth and try, not just give up and say "That's who I am."  Because it's not.  It's an action you've done, and it's less than you are capable of.

To be saints is not a privilege for the few, but a vocation for everyone. - Pope Francis

Then we are challenged to go into the world and share that mercy with others.  Not to overlook their sins, but to help them find peace, joy, and a Sacramental life of their own.  To help them encounter Christ first through you, then through the Church.  In Cursillo we call that "be a friend, make a friend, and bring that friend to Christ."   Don't try to take the log out of their eye while you're still not letting God's grace flow into your life.  Form a relationship with them, see Christ in them, love them.   Once a relationship is formed and they see you trying, they see you going to Confession and Mass.. then you can invite them to know Christ.  Then, Christ, the man with no splinters or specks in His eye, can help to remove the log that stands between a right relationship with Him.  Are you ready to do that?  Are you making frequent reception of the Sacraments a priority?  Not something to fit into your schedule but something your schedule fits around?  Are you making Christ, the remover of all splinters and logs, the focus of your day?  Are we ready to stop trying to break the glass of the other even further and instead bring them to the One who can restore them to wholeness?

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

Setting the World on Fire

A reflection on the readings for June 16, 2016.

Sirach 48:1-14
Psalm 97
Gospel of Matthew 6:7-15

In this mornings first reading we see a list of all the amazing things that Elijah and Elisha did in their earthly lifetimes.  From raising to dead to controlling the elements, we see these men of God were truly endowed with the Spirit of the Most High.  Elijah was of course taken up in the fiery chariots into Heaven and Elisha even continued to perform miracles after his death.  We as Catholics believe that to be a sign that the person has gone on into Heaven with God.   That's why we name those who have been shown with much evidence to have miracles attributed to their names as Saints.

The thing is Christ said that not only would we do the works that he did, but that if we truly believe we will do even greater things. (John 14:12-14)   That whatever we ask, no matter what the task, it will be done.  Of course we know that it requires us to be asking in the right Spirit, to be asking for something which is God's will.  How though can we expect to be transformed into living Saints?  Men and women capable of things beyond ourselves?  Images of Christ himself walking among the population of the world, changing our own environments.

In the Lord's prayer, which we pray at every Mass, we ask for our daily bread.  This of course has the connotation of being cared for, right?  Just as the scriptures remind us that we are more valuable than a flower or a bird, they also remind us that God will provide us for our needs.   So, yes, we ask for food to get us through the day.   The word there, though, in the original language does not say exactly daily, as much as 'super substantial bread.'   Give us this day the bread that is beyond bread, the bread of which it's substance is more than just bread.  The bread that feeds us, that makes us grow.  The bread that does not get consumed by our body to make it part of us, but rather consumes us and makes us part of it!  That's right, the Eucharist.

Christ calls us to be more.  He himself comes to us in the form of our most basic of needs, food and drink.   He then begins to transform us through Communion, through the Eucharist, into himself.   He gives us the power to become living Saints.  We have to be ready though, we have to accept that grace and allow it to transform us.  What does that look like?   What examples do we have of those who have been transformed?  That's why the Church gives us a Canon of Saints.  These are the men and women who it is clear from examining their lives and the miracles around them, are already in Heaven.  Just like Elijah and Elisha, the Saints are those who have lived lives that shout out to God's Spirit living in them, and even after death have been shown to have miracles associated with them.

One of those men was Saint Padre Pio, who was canonized on this day in the year 2002.  Padre Pio was known to do many miraculous things.  From bi-location (being in two places at once) to seemingly being able to see into another persons heart and soul.  He would often tell people in the confessional that they forget "this" sin and then proceed to tell them what it was.  Can you imagine that?  Being reminded of something that the other person has no earthly way of knowing?   Yeah, that would be a powerful moment.  He also received the stigmata, the wounds of Christ in his physical body.  From levitation to clairvoyance, Padre Pio shows us what being filled with Christ's Spirit can look like here on earth.

Now, of course each of us is called to a different station in life.  Some of us might not be Capuchin Friar's like Padre Pio, nor able to hear confessions.  The thing is, Jesus also reminds us that miracles were not His primary mission.  Rather He was sent to bring forgiveness.   Padre Pio offered this in the Sacrament of Reconciliation.  It should not surprise us at all that miracles happen in that sacred, Sacramental encounter with Christ.  What is more miraculous than the Prodigal Son returning or the one lost sheep being found?   The angels rejoice when we enter that Sacrament and confess before God himself and ask for forgiveness.  How often do we fail to see the beauty and need of that?  The most powerful part of it is though, that when we leave there we are challenged to take that into the world.

One of my local confessors always has the same penance for me.  "Pray for those you have hurt."  That's a powerful moment.  Even though someone else might be completely unaware of the thoughts or anger I've had toward them, Christ asks me in the confessional to pray for them.  Prayer is a moment that doesn't just change or effect things, but also changes and effects me.  It is a moment for me to bring about that other part of the Lord's prayer, "Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven."  Yes, prayer is a moment for me to bring God's will into my life and to open myself to the grace that can change me into a Saint.  It's not something we aim for just after this life, but something we should be aiming for right now... Where to start?  By going into the world and offering them forgiveness.  The same forgiveness we receive in the Sacraments.  What miracle could be more powerful than that?   Can you imagine if the entire world were 'infected' with the forgiveness and love of the Father?  What can I do? I'm just one person?  Remember, it only takes a pebble to start an avalanche.   Are you ready to be God's whirlwind of flame to set fire to the world?

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

Musical Chairs

In today's first reading we see that King David had it all.   He was rich.  Powerful.  Handsome.   He had an entire kingdom at his beck and call. Not just that, but God was on his side.  If we were to put it in terms of today's society, David's kingdom would be one where every home had a swimming pool, every person was able to eat organic food, and every child had an Iphone 6 at least.  It was a time of prosperity, the golden age of the Israelite kingdom.  Still, he wanted more.   He wanted a beautiful woman that he had been watching from his towering castle walls.  Only one problem, she was married.   So he had her husband killed in order to obtain her for himself.

It's easy for us to stand back and cast condemnation on David isn't it?  Yet, we are in a relationship with God.  A covenant relationship where God has called us to fidelity.  I will be your God and you will be my people.   Every time we choose something over God we are in essence killing Uriah and stealing his wife.   We are going outside of our 'marriage' to sleep with some other god, some other desire in the place of God himself.   St. Augustine said that "Our hearts are restless until they rest in thee."   Yet, 2000 years later we are still trying to put things into that God shaped hole in our heart.. things that don't quite fit.  They might make us feel better for a time.. but eventually.. eventually they chafe and hurt.  Eventually, what once brought us pleasure simply strikes our conscience like Nathan, reminding us of our sin.   Then we either add more of the same thing.. seek something new... or we can turn back to God as David did.

Fast forward to the scene of Jesus in the house of Simon the Pharisee.   This woman comes into the house and anoints Jesus with oil, washing his feet with her tears, and drying them with her hair.  Simon is indignant.   How could this man claiming to be a prophet let her touch him.   Simon thought that he was the righteous one, he was better than her!  He observed all the law and lived a righteous life.   She had a key to the relationship though, she was seeking God first.  She didn't let rules and norms get in the way of loving God, she just loved Him!  Nothing would stand between them.  She wasn't seeking love somewhere else, she was only after God's mercy and forgiveness, and loving Him the best she could.. with everything she had, even her tears.

Again, it's easy for us to look back and condemn Simon isn't it?  We always want to be the woman in the story, Mary of Bethany.   We want to be the one pouring out our tears on Christ's feet, and being forgiven.  Sometimes that is us indeed.   Other times we are Simon aren't we?  Looking down on others who do things differently than we.  Condemning them for the fact they aren't good enough, aren't dressed right, aren't as good as we are.  "How does she keep her job acting that way?"  "Why did she get a better review than me?"  "Did you see her kids misbehaving at the store?  She should control them better!"  We worry about others at Mass when we should be crying at the feet of Christ.   We let our own desires, our wants to be first and foremost, instead of being content with exactly what he has given us.  We kill Uriah over and over.

Remember, being Catholic is about being in a relationship with God.  It's about spousal fidelity.   My wife and I have been married for ten years.  It seems lately like she's inside my head.  We think a like.  We even say the exact same thing at the exact same time.  I'm not talking a word here or there, but entire sentences.  I'll often laugh and say "Get out of my head woman!"  The more time we spend together, the more alike we become.  I've found that to be true of every couple that have been married for generations.   Not only do they think alike, they begin to act alike, even to take on the same mannerisms.

That brings me to my final point.  Sometimes we are Mary of Bethany, sometimes we are Simon the Pharisee, but we are called to be at all times sitting in the chair of Jesus.  How do we do that?  Well just like with my wife, the more time I spend with her?   The more I think like her, act like her, and even begin to look and sound  a bit more like her.   It begins by spending time with her.  Crying at his feet in Confession, seeking his love in the Eucharist, and allowing His sacramental grace to transform us and lead us to be Him in the world.  This is what it means to be in a relationship with God, to live a Sacramental life.  What does that look like?  It's a life of joy.   It's a life where yes, sometimes we have to rebuke those who are being like Simon and to remind them of the true joy of sitting at Jesus feet.   It means seeking our relationship with God first and foremost, and allowing that relationship to effect every other aspect of our lives.

It also means realizing that every single person out there is made in the image of God.  Regardless of how they are living, what choices they have made, or who they seem to be.  With this tragedy of another mass shooting in the United States of America that's even more important than ever.  We can never forget the dignity and love that people deserve, because when we try to relegate them to not worthy.. when we try to put them as the other... that leads to tragedies.  Instead, it's time for us to stand up and be Jesus to the world.  If every Catholic lived their life in a way that made the love, joy and peace that comes from sitting at the feet of Christ evident, the world would be changed.  Are you with me?  Are you ready to show that love? As I said before... sometimes we are Simon.. sometimes we are Mary.. and sometimes we are Christ... which one do you think we need to be more often?


His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

Are you stretching?

I've written before about the time I went to the state and international science fair.  That year I put a ton of effort into that project. I practiced what I was going to say.   I memorized sections of code to be able to explain them to the judges without looking at the sheets in front of me.  I learned exactly what images were going to show on the screen and when.  Like the boy scout I hoped to be, I was prepared.  The next year, though, I didn't put so much effort into it.  I made a new board.  I didn't do any new research.  I ran the same old presentation with the same old computer.   It all looked better on this monster of a board my dad helped me make with clean images and lines, but to be honest.. it was the same project.  I still did ok.  I still won the computer science trip to state, but I didn't place there or get any kind of award.   The third year?  I didn't even make a new board.   I didn't do very well.  I simply had not put any effort into it.

In Today's first reading we see Elijah kneeling down and putting his head between his knees in prayer.  He asks his servant to keep an eye out, and he does seven times.  He keeps an eye out until Elijah has prayed 'enough.'  In scripture, seven represents fullness, completion.  Then this tiny cloud rises from the water.  Elijah doesn't question it, he doesn't think "well it's so small, that's not what I asked for."   No, he sends the message to Ahab to get on his chariot and get back to town, the gates of Heaven are about to open and water is going to flood them.  If Ahab isn't ready, this flood is going to overcome him.  It will stop him from getting where he needs to go.  Then Elijah girds himself (again, getting ready!) and he takes off on foot.  He stays in front of Ahab and beats him in a race back to Jezreel, foot vs horse.  That's some super hero action there!

Elijah shows us that preparation is key.  We have to be ready.  Taking off on a race without stretching is going to lead to some disastrous consequences, maybe even injury.    He doesn't take off until God has shown him that it's time, and then he trusts in it.  Prayer.   That's the start.   That doesn't mean we have to spend hours in silence listening to Gregorian Chant (though that's kind of nice too.)   It means that we take whatever moment we are, whatever circumstance we are in, and we pray through it.  We don't live our lives in a vacuum.  So we say our prayer while cleaning.  While changing diapers.  While walking to the car.  While driving.  We make those actions our prayers.   St. Paul talks about running the race, crossing the finish line with our heads held high, it requires diligence, training, preparation, and movement.

When we think of our spiritual lives, the first thing that pops into my mind is the Mass.  Jesus reminds us that before we come to that altar we must examine our conscience.   If there is anything that is between us and our brother, we aren't to come up but to leave our offering there and go to our brother.  Otherwise the opponent is going to take us before the judge.   How often do we ignore that?  How often do we just come on up with some sin in our heart, some injury we have failed to take care of.  We come to the most important prayer on this planet, the moment when Heaven itself touches earth, when we come forth to receive the Body and Blood of Christ into our own frail, mortal bodies.  Do we spend our time in prayer?  Do we read the readings before hand?  Do we prepare by going to our brother (the Priest) in confession and settling any debt we have?

St. Paul also says that if we receive the Body and Blood of our Lord unworthily, then we are responsible for his death.  That's a strong statement.  Too many of us, myself included, run into Mass at the last minute, make a quick genuflection and stumble through the book trying to find the song that has already started.  I think today's readings are a clear calling to make things right.   To reach out to those we have hurt, and to Christ himself in the Sacrament of Confession and say, "Lord Jesus Christ, Son of the Living God, have mercy on me a sinner."  In our society where the mantra is "you do you and I'll do me," Reconciliation has become something that many don't make use of.  A channel of grace, an encounter with Christ himself, where the line sometimes is non existent.   I believe if we truly understood what happens in that room, we wouldn't be scared to go, instead we'd be running trying to get in there.  How about it?   Are you ready before going up to receive?  There is no shame in sitting this one out, waiting in the pew with your head bowed while others go up to receive Him, or walking forward with your arms crossed just to be in his presence.

Much better isn't it?  To settle out of court now?  Than to risk being thrown into the prison where you will "not get out until you have paid every penny."

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease." 

Have you lost focus?

Several years ago my wife found some discounted tickets from Rockford to Arizona for a price we could not pass up.  So our family packed our things and flew the miles to the warm desert state to visit family and experience the world.  It was one thing to see the desert, the cacti, and the grand canyon in pictures.  It was another to experience the true majesty of God's creation in person.   To walk in the sand and heat, to see the sites and even to rest in the shade.   One day during the trip we went swimming at a pool.  Laying there in the shade I watched as the kids laughed and giggled.  Moira was almost two years old.   Her sister was watching her by the steps in the shallow end and her mother had gone to the bathroom.  At some point I dozed off.  I woke to a strange sound.  I don't know if it was Julie yelling or the bubbles in the pool, but when I jerked up I saw that Moira was no where to be seen and her sisters were over by the deep end.

It turned out Moira was under the water.  We got to her before she could drown, but to this day she still has a fear of getting water in her eyes.  I'll never forget those few moments of panic though.  Those moments when I thought my daughter was gone.  The fear of thinking my center, the person we were living for, the child we had been so intimately connected with for two years was possibly gone from our lives.  I can't imagine what that must be like for a parent.   To lose their child first.   It shouldn't be that way, right?  We all expect our kids to out live us, to be there until after we ourselves have passed.  Too many parents experience that right now in their lives, and my heart goes out to them.

In the readings for today, it is even more poignant that these widows had lost not just their child, but their only sons.  In a world where women have no rights, where they must be cared for by their husbands and their children in their old age, this was her center... her focus.. her only hope.   This child would be the one who would make an income for the family, provide them a home, give his mother a life.  Instead her hope was gone.  Her husband was already gone, any other sons as well, and here the last of the lineage was dead before her.  How angry these things make us, don't they?   So much so we blame God for them.  Why God?  Why do good things happen to good people?  Why pain? Why suffering?   Why death?  The widow of Zarephath had the same response.  "Have you come to me to call attention to my guilt and to kill my son?"

It's easy to do that isn't it.  Elijah in response did what we are all called to do.  He got on his knees and he prayed for the boy.  He gave his heart into it, groaning and begging God to make a change.   To restore hope, joy, peace.   He stood in the gap for the widow, bringing back her life to her.   Her focus was restored with the life of her son.   She knew then that Elijah was indeed a man of God because he spoke the "Word of the Lord."   That's a key to remember as well.  Our "yes must be yes and our no, no."   Our word must be truth, we must speak the Gospel as it is, not deviating or trying to make it our own.. it's not ours to change.  God has given it to us in His plan, His way.   We hand it on in the same manner.

Then comes the scene in the Gospel where Jesus performs a similar, but more astounding, miracle.  Unlike Elijah, He does not ask for permission to take the son into His arms, but rather puts His hand on the son of His own desire.   He informs them not to weep and then instead of needing to pray for God's intercession, He simply speaks "I tell you arise!" and it comes about.  The people realize at that moment that history has just changed.  This man is more than just a prophet, this is a man who speaks with authority.  "God has visited his people!"  This widow has been restored, given back her hope, her focus, the thing that makes life worth living.  

I imagine that is similar to what I felt when I saw Moira's head surface, spitting out water and gasping for air.  Relief, concern, but above all hope.   Peace.  That is what Jesus is offering to us today.  Every day we lose focus.   We lose some hope.   The world tears at us and Satan prowls around seeking to destroy us.  The news is depressing, kids reject their parents and their faith, and even the music is filled with drugs, violence, and degrading imagery.   We can encounter Him the same way the widow did, in person, directly, through the Sacraments.   In Reconciliation and in the Eucharist, we come face to face with Jesus who declares to us "Do not weep."   He then can restore to us that which was our focus, that which was lost.   He places himself in our hearts that we might be complete again, that we might have hope for eternal life, that we can know we are cared for and taken care of.   We are no longer on our own, He is with us.

Then He challenges us to go out into the world with Him.   To reach out to all of those others who have been widowed by their existence.   All of those who have lost hope, who have no one to care for them, who need food, drink, friendship.   To take that Sacramental presence we receive and become life givers, hope bringers, messengers of peace and joy.   It's only when we become little 'Christ's'  that we can even hope to manage that.   Not to go alone, but to bring Him into every interaction, every thought, every deed.  Mathew 25 tells us exactly how to do that.

Then the King will say to those at his right hand, ‘Come, O blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world; for I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me,  I was naked and you clothed me, I was sick and you visited me, I was in prison and you came to me.’  Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see thee hungry and feed thee, or thirsty and give thee drink?  And when did we see thee a stranger and welcome thee, or naked and clothe thee?  And when did we see thee sick or in prison and visit thee?’ And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brethren, you did it to me.’

So are you ready for that?  To feed the hungry, cloth the naked, welcome the refugee among you, give water to the thirsty, visit the sick and prisoner?    The world is filled with people who are imprisoned by their own vices, their own sinful natures.   It's our job as Church to go out and give them a reason for our hope.  To meet them where they are, and love them so much we never leave them there.   Instead we journey with them toward eternity, seeking to eat the wedding feast of the lamb with them by our side.   Make a friend, be a friend, and bring that friend to Christ.  We have work to do Church!

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

What does a second grader know about love?

When I was in elementary school I had a crush on the prettiest girl in class.   One day she told me and another boy that she would be the girlfriend of the one who brought her the nicest gift.  The other guy got her a record or something.  Me?  I went home and took a necklace from my mom's jewelry box.  It was a gorgeous golden thing with lots of sparkles.  I knew for sure that I'd win the competition and get the girl! I gave her the necklace and of course she chose it over the record or whatever it was, and there I was.. with a girlfriend.  I didn't know what to do with her.   Now things were awkward and I had to try and figure out what to do with a girl.  My second grade brain hadn't quite caught up to the concept of dating.

Later that evening my mother was in a panic.  One of her favorite pieces of jewelry, worth several hundred dollars had disappeared.  I had never seen her so sad, so anxious.  I felt horrible.   I had taken something that wasn't mine to get something else I wanted.  I went back to school the next day to explain to the girl that it wasn't a cheap necklace and that my mom wanted it back.  The girl got angry with me, gave me the necklace back, and went with the other boys present.  I returned the necklace. My mother told me if I had just asked, she would have given me something to give the girl.  It took me years to learn the fullness of that lesson: gifts only mean something when they cost us something, a true gift is sacrifice, and secondly... relationships should not be based on how much the other gives me, but on how much we give each other. No one should have to buy friendship, it should be free.

Today is the feast of Corpus Christi.  That is the day we Catholics celebrate the thing that makes us uniquely different from all other Christians in the world.  The Eucharist.  We believe that at the words of consecration the body and blood are transformed (transubstantiation) into the body and blood of Jesus Christ himself. We believe in the real presence of God himself in the sacrament.   We don't think it is just a symbol, but rather a reality that Christ himself promised at the last supper.

the Lord Jesus, on the night he was handed over,
took bread, and, after he had given thanks,
broke it and said, "This is my body that is for you.
Do this in remembrance of me."
In the same way also the cup, after supper, saying,
"This cup is the new covenant in my blood.
Do this, as often as you drink it, in remembrance of me."
For as often as you eat this bread and drink the cup,
you proclaim the death of the Lord until he comes.

We believe that when we attend Mass we are transported outside of space and time, that Heaven for a moment kisses earth and that Christ is made present to us.  It is not a new sacrifice, not a re-sacrifice of Christ, but the very sacrifice of Calvary made present to us through the mystery of the Holy Spirit.  We receive then the body and blood of our God himself in the form of the Consecrated Host.  That Host then begins to transform us, if we allow it, into the body of Christ.  We are made one, as He and the Father are One.   We are being formed into the image that we were created to be, the person we were made to be, not the one we have become because of our fallen nature.

That's what it means to live a sacramental life.  It is not enough to only receive, but we must give.   Not enough to simply take this wonderful gift that Christ has given us through the Church, but rather we must become it!  We must become Eucharist for the world, our bodies broken and our blood poured out to the other.  No longer can we simply want our own desires drive our efforts but instead we must get our ego out of the way and allow Christ to shine through us.  "Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven."  It only means something when sacrifice is involved.   Just like when I was a child I wanted to take my mother's necklace and receive the reward for myself, today I must instead give of my own gifts, of my own treasures, sacrificially.. only then does it mean something, only then am I walking in the footsteps of Christ himself.

In the Gospel today, Jesus tells them "Give them some food yourselves."  How often He still says that to us today.   Just like the disciples, instead of realizing who it is that is speaking, we begin to wonder if we have enough.  Despite all the times we have seen Him provide, despite the times we know He has multiplied what little we have to offer into a spiritual bouquet that above and beyond anything we ourselves could ever imagine.. we begin to count what little we have.  "I could give, but then how would I pay for this or that?"  "We should take care of us first."  "Why should we support those who don't work?  They should earn it too!"  "Refugees?  Take care of X person first, or Y person first."

Notice what Jesus does next?  He takes their offering, He blesses it, divides it, and gives it back to them.. and they give it to the world.   That's what the Eucharist is all about.   He takes the bread we offer Him, He transforms it into His very Body and Blood.. then He gives it back to us... to give to the world.  Our calling is to bring that Eucharist out into the world and to become it!   To be Him, His hands, His feet.  To be the Body of Christ in the world, broken for it.. poured out for it.. blood sweat and tears..  until the entire world has been transformed, until every person has encountered Christ and the offer of forgiveness of sins.  As we journey into Memorial Day we should be reminded of all of those who did just that.  All of those who poured themselves out on the battlefields, the ditches, the deserts and oceans.   They died that we could have this opportunity to be free, but we cannot forget.

As my wife and my kids and I sat around the campfire tonight, I began to pray evening prayer.  It struck me just how lucky we have it in this country.   I could hear the neighbors talking about their lives.  The kids were playing on their cell phones.   The other neighbors were cooking and discussing juice cleanses and such.  The sun was setting slowly through the trees and the clear blue sky simply watched as we were oblivious to the blessings that God has bestowed on us.  How many people were somewhere in this world starving to death as I ate my potatoes and onions?  How many were stuck in refugees camps at some border not allowed to pass into the safety of some other country?  How many would give anything to have the cold water bottle that was laying a few feet from me in the grass unfinished?  We have more than enough, way more than enough.  Why do we hesitate when God calls us to "give them something to eat?"   There will always be enough.. and if each of us simply gives a pebble... we can start an avalanche.  It's only when we start to make a difference that the widow, the orphan, the refugee, the broken and the less fortunate will begin to be healed and taken care of.

As a popular meme goes:

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

In season or out of season?

This morning at Mass the Gospel reminds us that even Jesus sometimes is in a bad mood.  As he walked in the morning hours, hungry and irritable, he came upon that poor fig tree.   It hadn't produced any figs.  Granted it wasn't the 'season' for figs, but that didn't stop Jesus from cursing the tree. This tree was acting like every other tree in the world.. just doing what all the other ones were doing.  Deacon Bill calls this story a parable in action.   Just like the stories that Jesus often tells to teach us spiritual messages, this action of his and it's results is in and of itself a lesson to be learned. All too often we want to wait till the time is ready by our standards, we want to be in control.   "I'll have kids when we can afford it."  "You know I'll get cleaned up when things get easier."  "I'll stop smoking after this audit is complete."  "I just need a few more drinks to get me through this month."  Jesus shows us a simple truth, God expects us to be ready "in season and out of season."   He wants us always producing fruit, regardless of what is going on around us... regardless of if we feel like it.  He wants us to be different.. not following the flow of things of the world, but of the things of Heaven.

There is a tree in my front yard that reminds me of this parable.   A few years ago a friend of mine lost her son to a drug overdose.  I noticed that afternoon that the tree was only getting leaves on half of it's branches.  Today it stands much the same with half of it looking pathetic, and half of it healthy and green.  The bark on the side that does not bloom is riddled with holes and falling off, and on the other side strong and firm.  It was as if that tree lost part of itself.  I wrote a poem about that, how that losing someone can be like that... like losing half of your self.. losing your way.  That tree is still plugging away trying, even if it doesn't feel like it.. even if seems like the world is against it, some disease eating away at it trying to sap it's strength.. it still struggles to find breath, digging in it's roots until it finds the nourishment it has to keep going.

CCC 1832 The fruits of the Spirit are perfections that the Holy Spirit forms in us as the first fruits of eternal glory. The tradition of the Church lists twelve of them: "charity, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, generosity, gentleness, faithfulness, modesty, self-control, chastity."

You and I are called to be like that.   Regardless of the pain and suffering we might endure.   Even if the entire world turns against us, father against son, mother against daughter, friend against friend; we are called to continue to produce fruit.  Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. We are to bloom where we are planted and to produce those fruits.   Peter reminds us in the first reading that the greatest of all these fruits is love, because love produces all of the others.  He challenges us to let our love for another be intense.   Another translation says let your love be fervent.  That is hot, burning and glowing!  Visible.  Apparent.  On the surface not just under it.

My wife and I have been married for ten years today.  For all of those years she has stood by my side, even when pain and illness made it impossible for me to stand as well.  She watched and cared for me as I had my back surgery and through the long, tedious recovery.  When I had my knee operated on, through many kidney stones, and days in which the pain was so horrible that I did not even move from the couch.  All through this she showed a fervent love, a love that bloomed and produced fruit regardless of how I treated her back.  There have been times when it wasn't smooth sailing.  Every couple argues at some point, every couple disagrees.  The thing is I don't remember those times as much.   When I think back I remember that kindness, the laughter, the smiles, the patience, and the trust.

1642 Christ is the source of this grace. "Just as of old God encountered his people with a covenant of love and fidelity, so our Savior, the spouse of the Church, now encounters Christian spouses through the sacrament of Matrimony." Christ dwells with them, gives them the strength to take up their crosses and so follow him, to rise again after they have fallen, to forgive one another, to bear one another's burdens, to "be subject to one another out of reverence for Christ," and to love one another with supernatural, tender, and fruitful love. In the joys of their love and family life he gives them here on earth a foretaste of the wedding feast of the Lamb: How can I ever express the happiness of a marriage joined by the Church, strengthened by an offering, sealed by a blessing, announced by angels, and ratified by the Father? . . . How wonderful the bond between two believers, now one in hope, one in desire, one in discipline, one in the same service! They are both children of one Father and servants of the same Master, undivided in spirit and flesh, truly two in one flesh. Where the flesh is one, one also is the spirit.

I think that's why Jesus reminds us today that sometimes we've got to turn over the tables that get in the way.  Every relationship has rocky moments.  For some, that means walking away.  I've heard hundreds of people say "we just fell out of love."  That does happen.   It happens when you let the tables get in the way, when you let the money changes fill up your temple, when you let the roots starve your growth until you produce none of the fruit.  Love isn't just a sappy feeling that makes you have butterflies in the stomach.  It's a choice. An action.  It's deciding each and every day to stand by someone, even when they aren't pleasant.  It is being willing to fight for the beauty that is the person you are and the vocation you are called to.  You are the temple of God.  You and your spouse are one, joined together by a Sacrament that transcends this visible world.  Are you willing to fight for it?  To dig in your roots and continue to bloom even when it seems like the bark is falling off and the ground is filled with rocks?  Are you ready to look into your heart and life and ask where are these money changes and tables that stand in the way of my relationship with God and my spouse?  That's what it takes to produce fruit.  I haven't always been the perfect husband, and there are many days that I am not a pleasant man to be around... but I do know this.. I want to turn over those tables, to drive out those things which inhibit me from producing fruit, and to grow day by day into the man and husband that God is calling me to be.

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

Pull em up!

There is a saying that my friend uses.  He says "get ready, be ready, stay ready."   The first reading from 1st Peter reminds me of that saying.  Peter reminds us to gird up the loins of our mind.   That doesn't seem to say a lot to us in today's society.   Our clothes are normally already split up the middle.  Jeans, pants, shorts.. we can easily go from walking to running without really worrying about any preparation, as long as we pull them up ;)   Ages ago people wore robes though.   To gird your loins meant to tie them up, to form them into a kind of pant so that you could run freely.  If you didn't, you would likely trip and fall.

It has another echo though that we as Christians should be aware of, one that our Jewish brothers and sisters would see almost immediately.  That of the Passover.   Be ready.   Have your shoes on.  Eat with your staff in your hand.  Have your loins gird and ready to go.  The Passover is coming and you need to be ready to leave.   What good would it be for you if God came and freed you if you couldn't outrun the army of Pharaoh?    So gird your loins.  Get ready, be ready, stay ready.

Peter talks about girding the loin of our minds though.   "Therefore, gird up the loins of your mind, live soberly, and set your hopes completely on the grace to be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ. Like obedient children, do not act in compliance with the desires of your former ignorance but, as he who called you is holy, be holy yourselves in every aspect of your conduct, for it is written, Be holy because I am holy."  Peter is challenging us to be alert because the devil is prowling about like a lion to devour us.   He wants us to fail, to sin.   Not only that, he wants us to wallow in our sin.. to think we are too bad, too horrible for God to forgive.  We must be ready at every moment.  Aware of what we are seeing, listening to, thinking.  Not out of some fear of doing something wrong.  No, out of love for Christ.

Jesus goes on to talk about the reward in Heaven, the reward for being Holy.   Just like the Apostles we are challenged to examine everything in our life and get rid of anything that prevents us from living our calling.  Even if it means giving up family, friends, wealth, power, success, pleasure, and honor.  All of those things will be restored 100 fold in Heaven.  Why?  Because of Christ.   Christ is the fullest revelation of God.   Everything we want to know about Him we can learn from the incarnation.  First and foremost, we see that Christ emptied himself of his power, of his glory, of everything that made Him God, to become a man.  To experience us fully, to draw so close to us that we ourselves can then draw closer to Him.   In Heaven, Christ will be our light, our glory, our honor.  It will be more amazing, more pleasurable, more real than anything we have ever experienced.

We don't have to wait till then though.   We can experience Christ fully right now, Heaven fully right now in the Sacraments.  The book of revelation gives us a view of Heaven, and we see that view lived out in the Mass.   At Mass, Heaven kisses earth!  It requires though that we gird up our minds!  Get ready, be ready, stay ready.   That's what we need to do before Mass.   We need to be ready for what is coming.  That means we need to be aware of what is coming.   It means we need to be in a state of grace.   It means we need to fast before receiving Him.  It means we need to go into mass with reverence and devotion, with the proper dispensation for receiving the grace of Christ in the Sacrament of the Altar.   In the Eucharist we can experience exactly what Jesus was speaking about... the fullness of God coming to reside in our minds, our hearts, our souls.  Do you believe that?   Lord I believe, help my unbelief.

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

Can anything good come from Clintwood?

Fifteen years or so ago the company I worked for hired this electrician from Baltimore.  He was supposed to be "all that and a bag of chips."  The one thing I do know, this man could finish a job faster than any other foreman that worked there.   I had a bit of a chip on my shoulder at the time because I was a foreman too but they kept putting me on his jobs as one of his helpers.  I did my job though.  I got fast at what I did, and I helped bang them out.   It wasn't until I'd been working with him a year or so that things began to show up that were iffy.  A problem on this job, a receptacle over here, etc.   Call back time and again to jobs he had finished in weeks, little things that added up to weeks or months of time repairing or fixing whatever it was that was wrong.   In the long run, you can't make money doing that... we spent more time on his jobs, but it always showed up as service calls, etc.

Finally it all came to a head when he asked me to do something that was just wrong.  He wanted me to install a heater with the wire coming through a concrete wall with no pipe, no insulators, just bare wire.  I refused.  So he sent me to work on the roof while he had someone else do it.   Then he asked me to just "stick a ground wire down a pipe" for a ground.  If you know anything about electricity, that's dangerous business.  This on a 200 amp disconnect.  I refused again.  He sent me off the job.   Soon I wasn't allowed on his jobs.  I kept getting crap work from the boss, and this hotshot kept getting all the high paying, overtime things.  He got the company truck, the gas card, the new tools etc..  I got to drive my own car several hundred miles a week, provide my own tools, and so on.   At the time I even kicked myself a bit.. everyone kept telling me just do what he tells you and things will get better.. "Everyone else does it, don't worry about it."  "If you want to make money you're gonna have to learn to cut corners...."   "You're from Clintwood, Virginia.. you should just do what you're told.. who else is gonna hire you?"

Then one winter we were working on a Church and the owner of the company showed up.  You could tell by the look in his eyes that something was wrong.  It turned out that on the roof of that job that I had been told to push a bare wire down a pipe, someone had touched an AC unit and been killed.  I looked at the man before me, I gave him that look... he knew, because I had told him when I was sent off that job why I was sent off.   I had still been punished, but I had stood up for what I knew to be right.  That company changed quite a bit after that.   Short cuts weren't taken anymore and profit wasn't as important.  The owner was a good man.. I know that... but he had allowed things to happen in order to make more money.

That's kind of what I get from the Acts of the Apostles.  Here are these men who have been arrested, thrown in prison and freed by an angel in the night. These were the same men who before were hiding in a locked room so no one would find them.  The same men who had run on the night Jesus was arrested, who had deserted him in his time of need.   Here they are, standing up to the very authority that all their life they had been told was the one to listen to.  This was the Sanhedrin!  If you listened to anyone as a Jew, that's the group of people you should be hearing.   Yet, they stand up for Christ, regardless of the consequences.  "We must obey God rather than men."   It would have been much easier to run away when they were arrested and freed.  Instead they go right back out and begin to preach again.  Later in that chapter we find them being flogged and beaten for this very action, and what happens?   "They left the presence of the council, rejoicing that they were counted worthy to suffer dishonor for the name. And every day in the temple and at home they did not cease teaching and preaching Jesus as the Christ."

What about you?  Are you willing to stand up for your faith?  Most of us are not called here in the affluence of America to be Martyrs.  The question is though, what is God calling you to?   Each of us receives a calling.  Each of us is being asked by God to do something.  For some is to be the best mother they can be.  For another the best accountant.  Another the best lawyer.   Our Catholicism doesn't end at the door of the Sanctuary... it is a part of us.   When we receive Christ in the Eucharist we are to go out into the world and be among the world, but not of it.   That means we are a Sacramental people.. we ourselves are a sacrament to the world.. we aren't just lawyers.. we are Catholic lawyers.   We aren't just teachers.  We are Catholic teachers.   We aren't just writers... we are Catholic writers.   Are you ready for that?  Bringing your Catholicism into the world even it means losing your friends?  Your family?  Your job?  The other question I must ask myself when I read this is, do I go forth rejoicing when I am dishonored for him?  Or do I go back to the upper room and lock myself inside spiritually?

We Catholics are given the greatest gift of any possible one.  Saint John says:

The one who comes from above is above all.
The one who is of the earth is earthly and speaks of earthly things.
But the one who comes from heaven is above all.
He testifies to what he has seen and heard,
but no one accepts his testimony.
Whoever does accept his testimony certifies that God is trustworthy.
For the one whom God sent speaks the words of God.
He does not ration his gift of the Spirit.
The Father loves the Son and has given everything over to him.
Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life

That's what we receive in the Eucharist.   How is it that we receive that which is above all, that which pours out God's grace with no limits into our soul, that Blessed Sacrament of the Altar which imparts eternal life and then go forth sour, angry and unchanged?   We cannot.  We must not.   When we receive Jesus into us we must be open to that grace which he pours out on us freely... allowing Him to change us.. to make us more like God... to make us people who speak of heavenly things.. to testify to what we have seen and heart.. like our brother and savior, Jesus Christ.

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

I'm not ready.

It's the end of Lent.  Today marks the start of the Holy Triduum.  At the Catholic Mass we relive these events that led up to the crucifixion of Christ so that we remember them always.  Tonight is the night that we spend with Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane, trying to stay awake as we pray with him.  It's also the night where we gather together in the Sanctuary and we watch as our Priest takes off his robes down to just his alb and begins to wash the feet of parishioners from all walks of life, both male and female. There is so much richness, so much treasure, so many pearls of great price to be learned from watching these events unfold before us and hearing the accompanying scriptures pronounced and sung.

It takes me back to my first Easter as a Catholic.  There I was trying to stay awake in the Garden.  I watched as many others walked out within just a few minutes of placing Christ in repose for adoration.  I had uncharitable thoughts.  "What you don't have time to spend more than a minute with Christ?"  "Why are you leaving so soon?" "Lord why can't they stay awake."  It was almost as if I were the Pharisee standing in the temple saying "Thank God I am not like this sinner."  Then the Eucharist caught my attention.  It was as if the Lord was speaking directly to me. "Can you not stay awake with me one hour?" My Lord reminded me that it was not they who were asleep.. but me... I was watching everyone else, but not watching Christ in the Eucharist.. not spending time in prayer with him.  I'll never forget that humbling lesson.

That's part of what is so amazing about being Catholic.  We don't just have a personal relationship with Christ, though we have that.   We also have a communal relationship with him, and better yet, we have a tangible, tactile relationship with him as well.  We believe that when the Priest says the words of consecration, the words that Christ himself gave us, that bread is transformed... that wine is changed... it's not just bread and wine anymore, it's substance has changed.  It is truly the body, blood, soul and divinity of our Lord and savior.  Think of that for a minute!  He not only comes down to see us, to be with us, to remind us of his presence in a substantial way; but he also allows us to receive him into our bodies to change us.. to mold us.. to bring us into that divine life that he promised.  We don't have to wait for the time after time itself ends for us, but we can experience Heaven right here and right now.

The book of Revelation used to scare me.   I used to spend hour after hour trying to pick out the right people in the news, the right signs, the right 'end of time' events... I was consumed with trying to find out when Armageddon was coming.  Then I read a book called The Lamb's Supper by Scott Hahn.  That book promoted an idea that was not new, one that the early church fathers held as well, that the book of Revelation was a vision of Heavenly worship.. Oh my how that changed my view of the Church and the Eucharist.. I began to see the flaming lamp stands around the altar, the Priest standing in persona Christi, the angels and saints gathering around and offering their prayers up as incense.. the prayers of the saints on earth... Oh yes, I began to see that God truly was present.. that Revelation was a glimpse of Heaven kissing earth.. A glimpse of the Holy Mass.

So tonight, tomorrow, Sunday... whatever Mass you are attending.. and not just during Easter, but for the rest of your lives.. Lift up your eyes to the Most Holy Sacrament of the Altar and say with Peter, "“Master, then not only my feet, but my hands and head as well.”  That's what this is all about.. about the Eucharist.. about Christ himself... about His perpetual sacrifice, his todah to bring us into communion with the Father again.. to bring us into a communion with God that is so amazingly beautiful, but so challenging that in John chapter 6 we see many of his disciples stop following him when offered it.  This is not easy.. Are you ready? To sit with him in the garden?  To walk with him towards Calvary?  To pick up your own cross and head to your own Easter?   Not alone I am not.  I am not ready Lord.. but thanks be to Adonai that he has sent his only son to me in the Sacraments of the Holy Catholic church to help me have to grace to take one step in front of another.

Lord give me the grace to strip myself of all my outer coverings and walls, to expose myself to those who need their feet washed.. the widow, the orphan, the alien... may I be given supernatural humility to put myself to the side and provide for what they need.  May I be a servant leader like you... you who are so humble that you will come down as the most defenseless thing ever.. a piece of bread.. to provide me with everything I need, both physically and spiritually.. May I too pour myself out, may I place myself in the hands of those who are hurting and be a sacrament of your love for them as well.

His servant and yours,
Brian

"He must increase, I must decrease."

And now you're so surprised to see me

In tomorrow’s reading we see the parable of the fig tree.  This sort of tree is a source of fruit, a source of nourishment for the world.  In the desert lands in which Jesus taught and journeyed it would have been seen as sustenance, life. The owner of the vineyard, the farmer, came along after three years of time and saw that the fig was still not bearing fruit.  He then turns to the vinedresser and says, “For three years now I have come in search of fruit on this fig tree but have found none. So cut it down. Why should it exhaust the soil?”(Luke 13:7)  The vinedresser in turn begs for another year.  He wants to spend more time cultivating.  More time giving the tree a chance to produce fruit.  Then, though, he will have to cut it down.

I find it extremely telling that the Owner speaks of three years of time.  Jesus himself had only three years of preaching to convince the Jewish people that he was the Messiah that they had been seeking.  Here the owner must indeed represent the Father.  It’s almost as if Jesus is giving us a glimpse of a conversation that was to come, one after his crucifixion.  God the Father has tired of the people who he has been sending messages to.  He tried to send them through Abraham.  He tried to send it through the prophets.  Then the judges.  Then during the time of the Kings.  Then he sent his only Son.  As in the Parable a few days ago, the tenants did not bother to give over that fruit they were supposed to be growing.  They abused the servants, and then killed the Son.  

 In the Eucharist he gives us everything we need to produce that sumptuous and elegant fruit that the Father seeks in our lives.  God is calling out to us in love, asking us to love in return.  To love God and our fellow man.   

I think this parable is much the same.  The owner of the vineyard has returned to collect that fruit.  Yet, here he finds the barren tree.  This person has borne no fruit though he has heard the word of God preached for a fullness of time.  Three is considered a perfect number.  Complete.  This person has heard the word long enough!  Yet he still rejects the message.  Then steps in the vinedresser.  He stands between  God and man, he intercedes on our behalf.   This man must be Jesus himself.  Though he has been toiling in the vineyard for three years, there are still these trees that bear no fruit.  Even though they have rejected him, even though they have sent him to a bloody, and thankless death, he still begs for them.

Jesus declared to his disciples that he was the vine, the thing from which sustenance flows.  That God is the gardener, the husbandman, the owner of the vineyard.  Jesus wants to give them more time.. he wants to nourish them… he wants to water the seeds that he has planted.  We as Catholics acknowledge that  “Jesus Christ is true God and true man, in the unity of his divine person; for this reason he is the one and only mediator between God and men.” (CCC 480)  He is the one who steps in to cultivate the dirt of our soul, to create a truly beautiful soil ready for growth, rich with virtue and grace.

How then can we apply this to our lives?   To our own situations?   We are the fig tree.  We are either producing fruit or not.  God has sent his message into our hearts.  He has given us all the tools we need to learn more. That’s the Son still calling out to us.  Through the Church, through the Scriptures, through nature itself, he continually digs around our roots and places nourishment there for us to consume.  In the Eucharist he gives us everything we need to produce that sumptuous and elegant fruit that the Father seeks in our lives.  God is calling out to us in love, asking us to love in return.  To love God and our fellow man.   He has sent his Holy Spirit into the world, into our hearts, to help us even further.. to fertilize our hearts.. to take away that dry weary land, that heart of stone, and give us a heart of flesh that will reach out to bring about God’s kingdom.

The Catechism says that “the fruits of charity are joy, peace, and mercy; charity demands beneficence and fraternal correction; it is benevolence; it fosters reciprocity and remains disinterested and generous; it is friendship and communion: Love is itself the fulfillment of all our works. There is the goal; that is why we run: we run toward it, and once we reach it, in it we shall find rest.” (CCC 1829) God is giving us just a bit more time, Christ is seeking to open our hearts to love.   We don’t have forever though.. it is appointed unto man once to die, and after the judgement. (Hebrews 9:27)  We don’t know when that will be.  The Parable says that the vinedresser asked for another year… another span of time, just another season.  Then comes the judgement though.. then if there is no fruit, it will be cut down.  The truth of the matter is this:  all of us have that one thing in common.  We are all going to die one day.  God has given us the fullness of time, he has given us every opportunity to produce fruit.. and how often we fail.  The son wanted us to have another chance, so much was his love for us that he came down as a man himself, and died in our place.  He has made the downpayment.. it’s up to us to do something about it.  We are planted in God’s vineyard through baptism, the Church.  The Church, the body of Christ, is continually tilling around us, feeding us with every spiritual food available through the Holy Spirit, the liturgy, the Scriptures, and the Sacraments.  Our roots are being nourished, but it’s up to us to drink.

The Samaritan woman at the well represents us.  We are going to the well.  If we only knew the gift of God, if we only knew who stands before us, if we only took a drink of the water he offers… our fruit would blossom so much that the whole world would see it!  Are you drinking of that well?  Or like the rich young man are you letting some attachment stand in your way?  It’s time for us to get in line behind Christ, to point our face toward the cross and say, “Here I am lord, speak your servant is listening.” (1 Samuel 3:10)

Once again, I must reiterate, Christ is coming to us daily.  He is seeking to pick that fruit.  He comes in the face of the stranger, the refugee, the orphan.  The homeless man down the street.  The angry fellow in traffic.  The tired, overworked nurse who just wants to complain on her lunch break.  The young couple in the pew who struggles with their child. That neighbor who just wants a little conversation, a little human interaction at the end of a long day. All of these people are looking for some fruit.  They just want to experience a little love.  Are you offering that fruit? Are you responding with joy, peace, and mercy? Are you running toward them with the open arms of the Father, with love?  Oh imagine the world in which we did such things, Church!  That line from Augustine quoted in the Catechism is so beautiful isn’t it? “There is the goal(love); that is why we run:  we run toward it, and once we reach it, in it we shall find rest.”  Are you running toward Christ in the least of these? There, there in the arms of the dying, the poor, the outcasts.. that’s where you’ll find the love of Christ reflected, that’s where you will find rest.

The Samaritan woman at the well represents us.  We are going to the well.  If we only knew the gift of God, if we only knew who stands before us, if we only took a drink of the water he offers… our fruit would blossom so much that the whole world would see it!

When God came down on the burning bush before Moses, the bush was not consumed.  It was rather transformed into something amazing, something beautiful, something that reflected the glory of God to the world.  It became a symbol, a beacon.  The place became so Holy because of the presence of the Holy Spirit that God said to Moses, “Remove the sandals from your feet, for the place where you stand is holy ground.”  Think about that symbolism for a minute.   As you walk up that Aisle today toward the Eucharist.. not only are you on Holy Ground.. but you are about to become Holy Ground. You are about to receive God himself into your body.  You are about to be filled with that same glorious power that Moses saw radiating from the burning bush.  It does not destroy you.. it transforms you.. Are you allowing it do just that?  Are you allowing God’s light to shine into the world in such a way that people want to remove their baggage, their spiritual shoes, and walk in the presence of God?  Are you offering them that fruit?  Only you can offer the unique fruit that you are designed to give.  No one else can give it the same way, the same kind, the same you.  Are you ready to be a fig tree in God’s garden?  Are you ready to be Holy Ground?  

His servant and yours,

Brian

“He must increase, I must decrease.”